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Jul 02
Love0
grandparents and a family farm

The summer safety net… Why grandparents matter more now than ever

By Education, environment, Family Farms, Green, Mental health
by Nicola Henderson CEO, Godstone Farm

For many families the long summer holidays are a time of anticipation – lighter evenings in the garden, picnics on the Downs and ice creams after a day out. But behind the postcard moments, there’s a quieter reality that many parents will recognise – six weeks is a very long time to juggle work, childcare and family life.

With many households balancing busy careers – often commuting into London – with family life, the logistics of summer can feel particularly stretched. Holiday clubs fill up quickly, childcare costs soon add up and annual leave only goes so far. This is where grandparents step in, not just as occasional helpers, but as a vital part of the fabric of modern family life.

Across the UK, grandparents’ contribution is extraordinary. More than half of grandparents now provide some form of childcare during the working week, often stepping in for hours – and sometimes days – at a time. On average, they provide over 20 hours of childcare a week, quietly filling gaps that formal childcare simply can’t always reach.

For many families, this support isn’t just helpful, it’s essential. Around 57% of parents with children under 13 rely on grandparents for childcare, and in a country where costs continue to rise, that support has a very real economic impact. It enables parents to continue working, while also giving children a sense of continuity and care that can be difficult to replicate elsewhere. But reducing grandparents to a line in a childcare spreadsheet misses the point entirely. What they offer goes far beyond logistics.

When out and about you can see this every day. Grandparents aren’t just supervising, they’re guiding, reassuring and connecting generations. They bring a different pace, a different perspective and often a kind of patience that today’s busy parents simply don’t have the luxury of time to offer.

There’s growing recognition of the emotional and developmental benefits this brings. Time spent with grandparents can help children feel more secure, broaden their understanding of family and identity and build confidence in social relationships. For grandparents themselves, the benefits are equally powerful, from improved wellbeing to a stronger sense of purpose and connection. In many ways, it’s one of the most natural and reciprocal relationships we have.

And yet, it’s also evolving. Modern grandparenting looks very different to a generation ago. Many are still working, travelling or living further afield, while also navigating new parenting styles and expectations. At the same time, families are increasingly relying on them not just for occasional help, but for regular, structured childcare, particularly during the school holidays.

Summer shines a spotlight on this dynamic. When school’s out for summer, parents often find themselves piecing together a patchwork of annual leave, flexible working and favours and it is grandparents who provide the continuity. They are the ones organising impromptu

days out, revisiting favourite places and creating the kind of simple, memorable moments that children often remember most vividly.

From a visitor attraction perspective, more of these multi-generational visits can be seen now than ever before. Grandparents aren’t just accompanying families; they’re often the ones planning the day, packing the snacks and really making an occasion of it. There’s something very special about watching those interactions unfold, whether it’s helping a toddler feed a goat for the first time or simply sitting together, unhurried, sharing an ice cream.

Many places have tried to respond to this shift in small but meaningful ways. There’s the occasional Grandparents’ Days which are designed to celebrate that relationship, creating space for shared experiences that feel easy, welcoming and inclusive. There’s a growing number of senior discounts and promotions as businesses start to realise the power of ‘the grey pound’ and during the summer holidays, when routines can feel anything but simple, the world really is starting to understand that value and flexibility matters.

A membership or loyalty pass has become a popular option for families looking for somewhere safe, familiar and relaxed to return to, particularly for grandparents caring for children across multiple days, who value anenvironment that feels manageable as well as enjoyable. It’s not about grand gestures, but about consistency – somewhere children can discover, play and build confidence, and grandparents can feel at ease – with access to excellent coffee too!

Of course, it’s important to acknowledge that not every family has this support. For some, grandparents may live far away, be working themselves, or simply not be part of a child’s life. And that’s where the idea of ‘chosen family’ becomes just as important. Extended family, close friends and neighbours – these networks can play an equally meaningful role. What matters most is that children have access to a wider circle of trusted adults; people who bring different experiences, perspectives and care into their world. Because family life rarely operates in neat categories. It’s fluid, interconnected and often beautifully collaborative. And while grandparents play an extraordinary role within that, it’s one that deserves to be recognised, not assumed. Because alongside the joy, there is also generosity. Time, energy and patience often given quietly, without expectation.

So, this summer, as families everywhere navigate the juggle, perhaps the real story isn’t just about how we fill the weeks, but who we fill them with. Because in the end, it won’t be the perfectly planned days that children remember most. It will be the people.

Godstone Farm in Surrey offers enriching outdoor experiences all year round.

www.godstonefarm.co.uk

Jul 01
Love0
resilient children

How to raise more resilient children

By children's health, family, Mental health, play, Wellbeing
by Cheryl Donaldson, Licensed marriage and family therapist

As parents, we are raising children to navigate the unknown. The world today is nothing like the one we entered. Everything has shifted – tech, culture, education, work – and it will continue to shift in ways that we cannot predict despite our best efforts.

The question becomes: how do we prepare our children for a world we don’t yet understand?

In my 30+ years as a licensed marriage and family therapist, and in raising my own three children, I know that adult self-esteem is shaped in childhood. The small things we say to our children, and what we expose them to, have a profound and lasting impact on how they come to see themselves.

I define self-esteem as the internal confidence we have as individuals to tackle the unknown. That confidence is not built through belief alone; it is gained through incremental exposure to new and uncomfortable things.

With our children, this can begin in very small ways. It could be letting our child spend the night at their grandparents’ house, or letting them order for themselves at a restaurant. It’s bringing them into new social spaces where they have to learn to manage themselves in others’ presence. These moments may seem insignificant, but they compound internally during development. And as parents, we need to affirm them when they face challenges, even if it doesn’t go to plan. We can say things like, “I love how you navigated that situation!” or “That was so cool how you challenged yourself in that new environment.”

In our own family, we introduced this idea in both big and small ways. When my three boys were all under the age of five, my husband and I moved our family from Chicago to the Netherlands. It was a complete step into the unknown. They were suddenly immersed in a new language, a new culture and a completely different way of life. At every stage, we repeated the same message: you are capable.

That experience gave us, as a family, the opportunity to talk about differences, to stay curious rather than fearful, and to expand what felt familiar. At times, this was messy. It’s not always a perfect picture. That messiness is how you know you are putting them in new situations. If it were straightforward, then there would be nothing pushing them to learn new skills. Over time, I watched this shape how my children moved through the world. They became more adaptable and more open to engage with unfamiliar environments, while still staying connected to themselves.

We tend, as parents, to shelter our children from things that are different from them. When our child is struggling with something, we want to take that struggle away. This instinct comes from a loving place, but it often has the opposite effect. I once worked with a parent whose child became anxious if she was even a few minutes late for school pick-up. Her immediate instinct was to eliminate that anxiety. She would plan her whole day around not being late, stress about getting there, and over-apologise if she was late, as if it were a major mistake. That behaviour communicated to the child that his emotional response was valid and didn’t allow him to develop a new skill for coping with those difficult emotions.

Anxiety is our body’s way of communicating to us that we need a new skill. When we step in too quickly to remove that discomfort from our children, we prevent them from learning to tolerate it, manage it and move through it on their own. The more we solve our children’s problems, the more we communicate that they cannot solve them on their own.

This is not an argument for loose parenting. Our job as parents is to keep our children safe. They need structure to feel safe exploring that unknown territory. But there is a difference between protecting a child and preventing them from having experiences that help them grow. As parents, we need to cultivate intentional experiences that push them out of their comfort zones so they develop internal self-esteem and resilience. Again, this process can be messy. But it’s so important for the long-term growth of that child.

Adversity is something we do not want to remove from our children’s lives. It is that adversity that will produce the circumstances for them to grow. As parents, we have to decide how we are going to define adversity. In my practice, I’ve seen a child not being invited to a party, for example, quickly become catastrophic. Not because of the event itself, but because of how the parents interpret and react to it. Children absorb our reactions. If we respond with panic or distress to minor adversities, we reinforce the negative experience. If we respond with calm and perspective, they learn that they can move through it.

In many ways, we are helping our children create a story about what challenge means. Is it something to avoid, or something to move through? When we begin to frame challenges as something they are capable of handling, rather than something to fear, we lay the groundwork for something incredibly important: flexibility.

Flexibility is the ability to say, whatever situation is given to me, I am going to make the best of it. It is what allows a child to navigate not making a team, struggling in school, or facing disappointment without losing their sense of self. It is also what allows them, later in life, to adapt to careers, relationships and environments that do not go according to plan.

We are not raising children for a predictable world. We are raising them for an unknown one. And in that world, it will not be their environment that determines how they fare, but their internal capacity to meet it and thrive despite what comes their way.

Cheryl Donaldson is a licensed marriage and family therapist who works with individuals, families and organisations to build systemic self-esteem. Her cross-border private practice and consultancy firm is based in Charleston, South Carolina and London. For more information on her work please visit www.cheryldonaldsonlmft.com

Mar 16
Love0

Supporting your child’s mental health

By ADHD and neurodiversity, Education, Mental health, Relationships, special educational needs, Wellbeing
by Emily Snape
author and mother

Supporting a child’s mental health rarely looks the way we expect it to. There isn’t a clear plan and progress is rarely straightforward. What works at one stage can stop working at another and what helps one child may not help the next. Over time, I’ve learned that supporting mental health is less about having the right answers and more about paying attention, staying connected and learning what your own child needs.

My middle son has ADHD, and our experience has included meltdowns, anxiety, school avoidance, high-energy moods and behaviours that can be difficult to manage. There have been moments when I’ve worried about what these struggles might mean long-term, and times when I’ve felt like I’m getting so much wrong.

One thing that has become very clear is that the relationship between me and my child must come first. Before consequences, before explanations, before trying to move things along. When a child is overwhelmed, what can help most is knowing that the adult in front of them is steady and on their side. That doesn’t mean removing boundaries or avoiding difficult conversations – it means prioritising connection, particularly when things are not going well.

Learning to notice the detail
With time, I’ve become better at noticing the detail behind behaviour. What looks like defiance or refusal is often anxiety, exhaustion or something that has built up quietly. Asking myself what might be driving a reaction, rather than focusing on stopping it, has helped me respond more calmly.

I’ve also learned that timing matters. My children rarely talk when emotions are running high. Some of the most useful conversations have happened in the car, or at bedtime, when the day has slowed down. Those moments can’t be forced, but they can be made possible.

Connection before direction
When emotions are high, instructions tend to land badly. I’ve learned that it usually works better to slow things down first, to sit nearby, acknowledge how difficult something feels, and wait. Once a child feels understood, they are far more able to reflect and take things on board.

Revisiting situations afterwards has also been important. I don’t always respond as well as I’d like in the moment. Going back to talk things through, and apologising, when necessary, has helped maintain trust and repair the relationship.

Remembering that feelings change
One thing I remind myself of regularly is that feelings are temporary. This has helped me keep perspective when my child is distressed, even if I’m feeling anxious myself.

When my eldest son, who is 16 and in the middle of his GCSEs, came back from the hairdresser last week, he was completely distraught. He announced he wouldn’t be leaving the house until it had all grown back. At the time, it genuinely felt like a crisis. I went straight into problem-solving mode, trying to reason with him that it was ‘just hair’, while panicking about school, exams and what Monday morning was going to look like. It took a few careful steps to get him back into school, but once he realised it wasn’t the catastrophe he’d imagined, he was able to move on. A week later, and he’s totally moved on – though at the time, it felt anything but small.

Of course, that isn’t always the case. Anxiety can be persistent, and school avoidance has been an ongoing challenge for us. It’s draining, and there are no quick solutions. But even here, I’ve learned that progress is rarely linear, and that patience and understanding tend to achieve more than pressure.

Opening conversations about ADHD
I wrote my books, My Amazing ADHD Brain and My Amazing Autistic Brain to help open conversations, both for children and for the adults around them. They are intended as a way for children to understand how their brains work, and to see themselves in a balanced and positive light. For many families, books can offer a starting point for conversations.

I’m still learning, and there are still difficult days. But I know now that supporting a child’s mental health isn’t about fixing everything or getting it right all the time. It’s about being consistent, paying attention and always staying by their side.

Emily Snape is a children’s author and illustrator living in London. Her work has appeared online, on television, in shops and even on buses! She has three cheeky children, Leo, Fin and Flo who keep her on her toes. www.emilysnape.co.uk Emily’s newest book ‘My Amazing Autistic Brain’ is published by Summersdale, £6.99

Mar 15
Love0
angry father

When the volume goes up, connection goes down

By Childcare and Nannying, family, Mental health, Relationships
by Giulia Galli
Parental Coach

How our words and our tone become their inner voice

Lately, I’ve been noticing a sound that cuts through everyday life – not laughter from the playground or the hum of conversation drifting from kitchens, but shouting. Not the occasional raised voice that slips out in frustration, but the repeated, sharp, heavy kind.

Sometimes it’s siblings snapping at each other. Sometimes it’s teenagers slamming back at parents. And often, it’s parents themselves, shouting at toddlers, at primary-age children, even at babies not yet walking.

One mother’s voice has stayed with me. Every time her one-year-old knocks something over or spills his food, her response is the same: loud, harsh, full of judgement. Every fall of a toy, every food-splattered shirt, every curious gesture that leaves a mark is met with anger. He’s only one. Just one.

And yet, what he is learning isn’t just how objects fall or how sounds are made: it’s what power feels like. What anger sounds like. What happens when you do something ‘wrong’. What it means to be small in a world where big voices rule.

Let’s be clear – this isn’t about shaming parents. We’ve all raised our voices. I have, too. Shouting happens. Sometimes we’re exhausted, sometimes we’re overstimulated, sometimes we’re carrying far more than our nervous system can handle. And many of us grew up with shouting ourselves, so it became the norm.

But here’s the truth – shouting doesn’t teach reflection. It teaches fear. It doesn’t create understanding. It creates compliance. And in children, especially very young ones, it doesn’t build confidence. It builds shame.

Think about it – when a toddler spills water, shouting doesn’t teach them how to hold the cup better next time. It teaches them that trying is dangerous. When a child touches something fragile, a loud scolding doesn’t teach caution, it teaches that curiosity isn’t safe. When a child is overwhelmed and cries, shouting doesn’t teach them how to regulate their feelings, it teaches them that big emotions aren’t allowed.

This is the danger of repeated shouting: it turns moments of behaviour into a story about identity.

“I dropped something” becomes “I’m clumsy.” “I was curious” becomes “I’m annoying.” “I was upset” becomes “I’m too much.”

Those stories stick. And they echo long after the moment has passed.

The irony is that shouting might get us what we want in the moment – it might stop the behaviour. But the cost is disconnection. We silence. We scare. We disconnect. And in that silence, children don’t learn what to do differently. They just learn to feel small.

So what’s the alternative? First, awareness. Notice when the urge to shout rises. Often, it’s not the behaviour itself that pushes us over the edge, but the meaning we attach to it: “He’s doing this on purpose.” “She never listens.” “I can’t take this anymore.” That story is what fuels the reaction.

Second, pause. Parenting gives us endless opportunities to reset. Even a few seconds can change everything. Lower your voice instead of raising it. Name your own feeling: “I’m getting frustrated.” Ask for help: “Let’s take a minute to calm down.” Step out of the room for three breaths before you respond. Replace “What’s wrong with you?” with “Let’s try again.”

Small shifts like these model something powerful. They show children that mistakes are part of learning. That emotions can be managed without force. That connection matters more than control.

Because children aren’t just learning from our instructions. They’re absorbing our example. The words and the tone we use today becomes the inner voice they’ll carry tomorrow.

Think back to your own childhood. The voices you heard most often probably still echo in your head. They may tell you to “be careful,” to “try harder,” or perhaps to “quiet down.” Those phrases, spoken in particular tones, become part of who we are. And now, as parents, we are shaping that voice for our children.

That’s why shouting is more than just noise. It’s a message. And if repeated, it becomes a belief.

This isn’t about never shouting again. None of us are perfect. It’s about noticing, repairing and choosing differently when we can. Even after we’ve raised our voice, we can come back and say, “I shouldn’t have shouted. I was tired and frustrated. Let’s try again.” That moment of repair doesn’t erase what happened, but it teaches accountability. It shows children that mistakes can be mended.

One day, our children will be grown. They may not remember every word we said. But they will remember how it felt to be with us. Was the home a place where mistakes were punished or explored? Where curiosity was stifled or encouraged? Where fear entered the room with us or safety did?

When the volume goes up, connection goes down. But when we choose calm, patience and presence instead, we give our children something far more lasting than obedience: we give them an inner voice that supports them for life.

Giulia Galli is a parental coach and author of When a Parent is Born. She supports families with intentional parenting. For further information please visit www.reegal.co.uk

Mar 02
Love0
angry boy

Family mediation and child‑focused parenting through separation

By children's health, Finance, Legal, Mental health
by Yulia Osudina
YO Mediation

Separation or divorce is a significant transition for any family. When children are involved, parents often experience heightened concern about how decisions relating to living arrangements, schooling, routines and communication will affect their children’s emotional wellbeing. Research and best practice consistently show that children cope best with separation when parents manage conflict constructively and keep children’s needs at the centre of all decision‑making.

Family mediation provides a confidential and structured environment in which parents are supported to reach practical, child‑focused solutions tailored to their family. Mediation encourages cooperation, respectful communication and problem-solving.

What is family mediation?
Family mediation is a facilitated process in which an impartial, trained mediator helps parents communicate more effectively, explore options and reach mutually acceptable agreements. Rather than focusing on blame or past conflict, mediation looks forward, helping parents plan for their children’s future in a way that minimises stress and disruption.

Mediation can address a wide range of issues, including financial matters and arrangements for children. In this article however, the focus is on child arrangements mediation. This can support parents in resolving disagreements about where their children live and spend time – which school they attend, term-time routines and holiday planning, special occasions such as Christmas and New Year’s, grandparents’ visits, religious upbringing and arrangements that take account of special educational needs (SEN), as well as many other aspects of family life.

A key principle of mediation is that parents remain in control of decisions affecting their children. The mediator does not take sides or impose outcomes, but supports both parents to focus on what will best support their children’s stability, security and emotional development.

A child‑focused approach to mediation
While separation ends an adult relationship, it does not end parenting. As such, mediation can help parents to shift from a couple‑focused mindset to a co‑parenting one.

A child‑focused mediation process helps parents to:
• Consider decisions from the child’s perspective rather than through parental conflict.
• Recognise how ongoing disputes can affect children emotionally and behaviourally.
• Develop arrangements that promote consistency, reassurance and strong relationships with both parents where it is safe to do so.
• Communicate in ways that reduce tension and model positive behaviour for children.

Mediators support parents to keep discussions centred on children’s day‑to‑day experiences, such as routines, schooling, holidays, communication and transitions between homes. This practical focus helps reduce emotional escalation and keeps conversations constructive.

When mediation is particularly helpful
Mediation can be especially effective:
• At an early stage of separation, before positions become entrenched.
• When parents wish to avoid the stress, cost and delay of court proceedings.
• Where communication has broken down but both parents remain committed to their children’s wellbeing.
• For families with young children who benefit from predictable routines and low conflict.
• In cases involving children with special educational needs or additional vulnerabilities, where careful planning and cooperation are essential.

Supporting children with Special Educational Needs (SEN)
For families with children who have special educational needs, separation can present additional challenges. These children may rely heavily on routine, consistency and coordinated support across home and school environments.

Mediation provides a structured space for parents to:
• Share information about their child’s needs, support plans and professional input.
• Discuss how routines, therapies and educational arrangements will be managed across two households.
• Agree on communication methods that ensure both parents remain informed
and involved.
• Reduce misunderstandings that can arise when stress and uncertainty are high.

A mediator with experience in SEN matters can help parents focus on practical, realistic arrangements that prioritise the child’s wellbeing while recognising each parent’s capacity and circumstances.

Child‑inclusive mediation
In some cases, and where appropriate, mediation can include the child’s voice. Child‑inclusive mediation is usually suitable for children aged around ten and over, depending on their maturity and circumstances. This approach allows children to speak privately with a specially trained professional, ensuring their views are heard without placing responsibility on them for decision‑making.

The purpose is not for children to choose outcomes, but to give parents insight into how their child is experiencing the separation. For younger children, mediation remains parent‑focused, with decisions guided by professional understanding of children’s developmental needs.

The benefits of early, child‑focused mediation
Engaging in mediation at an early stage can have lasting benefits for the whole family:
• Reduced conflict and improved communication between parents.
• Faster, more flexible resolutions than court‑based processes.
• Tailored arrangements that reflect the unique needs of each child.
• Greater emotional security for children through consistent, cooperative parenting.
• A stronger foundation for long‑term co‑parenting.

Preparing for mediation
Parents can help mediation be as effective as possible by:
• Approaching the process with a willingness to listen and reflect.
• Keeping the focus on their children’s needs rather than past grievances.
• Gathering relevant information, such as school reports or support plans.
• Being open to compromise in the interests of stability and reassurance for their children.

Family mediation, guided by child‑focused principles such as those set out by Resolution’s ‘Parenting Through Separation’ framework, offers parents a constructive way forward during an emotionally challenging time. By prioritising children’s needs, reducing conflict and encouraging cooperative co‑parenting, mediation supports families in creating arrangements that promote security, resilience and positive long‑term outcomes for children.

For parents seeking a calm, respectful and child‑centred approach to separation, mediation provides a valuable alternative to adversarial processes and helps lay the groundwork for healthy parenting relationships in the years ahead.

For further information on how Yulia Osudina at YO Mediation can help you in your own circumstances please visit www.yomediation.com or email yulia@yomediation.com

Nov 10
Love0
growing confidence in children

Growing confidence

By Education, Mental health, Relationships, Wellbeing

Why many children are struggling and how parents can help

Confidence is often described as the quiet superpower that shapes a child’s life, influencing everything from their mental wellbeing to their willingness to try new things and build friendships. Yet, recent research shows that a significant number of children in the UK are facing a confidence crisis – one that could have lasting impacts if left unaddressed.

The Listen Up Report from youth and education agency Hark reveals that up to one in three adolescents nationwide experience little or no confidence. While the report focuses on young people aged 11 to 18, many of the challenges it highlights are rooted in earlier childhood and can begin to take shape well before secondary school.

What is the ‘confidence crisis’?
Children with low confidence often struggle to speak up in class, join social activities or express their opinions. This ‘unheard third’ – roughly 10 children in every classroom – may find it difficult to participate fully in school and social life, which can hold them back academically and emotionally.

The report found that at age 11, when children start secondary school, around 29% already feel little or no confidence. This figure rises as children face new pressures and transitions during adolescence. Although confidence can improve with time, early experiences are crucial in shaping a child’s self-belief and future aspirations.

What’s behind the decline in confidence?
The factors contributing to this crisis are complex and interconnected:
• The lingering impact of Covid-19
School closures and social isolation disrupted normal childhood development, making it harder for children to build social skills and resilience.
• Social media and online pressure
Even younger children are exposed to the pressures of maintaining an ‘online persona’ through siblings or early access to technology. The fear of judgment and comparison can chip away at their self-esteem.
• Fear of judgment and lack of emotional safety
Many children, particularly girls and those from minority groups, feel they cannot speak openly without being misunderstood or judged harshly. This fear stifles their confidence to express themselves authentically.

Without safe spaces at school or home to discuss feelings and experiences, children may internalise their doubts, leading to a downward spiral of invisibility and self-doubt.

Why early confidence matters
Confidence in childhood is not just about feeling good in the moment – it shapes how children engage with learning, develop friendships and approach challenges.

Children who lack confidence are less likely to participate in class, join clubs or speak up, which means they miss out on valuable opportunities to grow and be seen.

This invisibility can become a self-perpetuating cycle – the quieter a child is, the less support and encouragement they receive, further eroding their confidence and narrowing their future possibilities.

What can parents do?
The good news is that confidence is not a fixed trait – it can be nurtured and developed with the right support and environment. Parents play a vital role in helping their children build belief in themselves. Here are some practical ways to help:
• Create safe spaces for expression
Encourage your child to share their thoughts and feelings without fear of judgment.
Listen actively and validate their experiences.
• Celebrate small successes
Recognise and praise your child’s efforts and achievements, no matter how small. This builds a sense of accomplishment and motivation.
• Model confidence and positive self-talk
Children learn by example. Show them how to approach challenges with a growth mindset and kindness towards themselves.
• Support social skills development
Encourage play dates, group activities and social interactions that help your child practise communication and cooperation.
• Be patient and persistent
Building confidence is a journey, not a race. Consistent encouragement and under-standing make a big difference over time.

A call to listen louder
Every child’s confidence journey is unique, and it’s vital that parents, teachers and communities work together to see, hear and value each child. The Listen Up Report reminds us that confidence gaps are not personality flaws but broken social patterns that can be changed.

By fostering environments where quieter voices can thrive and teaching children to believe in themselves, we can help them step through doors they might not even see are open to them.

This article is based on insights from Hark’s Listen Up Report 2025, a comprehensive study on youth confidence in the UK. Hark is a London-based education and youth agency with over 30 years’ experience supporting young people and organisations to build confidence and skills. For further details or to read the full report please visit www.harklondon.com/listen-up/

 

Nov 05
Love0
performing arts

Beyond the curtain: The academic benefits of performing arts education

By dance & Art, fun for children, Mental health, panto, Panto
by Theatretrain
www.theatretrain.co.uk

Performing arts education is more than a creative outlet. Studies show that involvement in theatre, dance and music leads to better memory, concentration, literacy and overall school performance.

While the spotlight shines on stage, the benefits of performing arts reach far into the classroom. Far from being a distraction from academics, the arts actually enhance learning – in measurable and meaningful ways.

Boosting brain function
Neuroscience confirms that engaging in music, dance and drama activates multiple areas of the brain. These areas are also responsible for:
• Memory
• Language processing
• Concentration
• Emotional regulation

This means children involved in the arts are often better equipped to handle academic challenges.

Improved literacy and language skills
In drama, students constantly read, write, speak and listen. These tasks build:
• Vocabulary
• Reading fluency
• Comprehension
• Verbal confidence

Performers must understand tone, intent and narrative structure – all of which transfer to English and literacy studies.

Enhanced memory and focus
Memorising lines and choreography requires mental discipline. Students develop tools for:
• Retaining information
• Sustained concentration
• Pattern recognition

These skills apply directly to learning maths, science and other subjects.

Creative thinking in problem solving
Performing arts encourage ‘thinking outside the box’. Children learn to:
• Approach challenges creatively
• Link ideas across subjects
• Use storytelling to understand complex ideas

Emotional regulation and academic confidence
Children involved in the arts often:
• Handle stress better
• Express frustration in a healthier way
• Believe more strongly in their own abilities

This emotional resilience supports classroom learning and behaviour.

Team learning in arts and academics
Performing in a group teaches cooperative learning, a key approach in modern classrooms. Students learn to:
• Share responsibility
• Respect diverse ideas
• Learn through doing

What the research says
A report from the Arts Education Partnership found that students involved in the arts consistently outperform their peers in academic subjects and standardised tests.

Famous supporters of arts in education
Actor and singer Julie Andrews said, “I think music and the arts should be a mandatory part of every school day.” Her belief is backed by research showing real academic benefits.

Tips for parents
• Encourage your child’s arts involvement alongside school.
• Highlight the connections between arts and academics.
• Celebrate progress and curiosity, not just grades.

Final thoughts
The arts don’t compete with academics – they complement and enhance them. By engaging in theatre, dance and music, students become more focused, expressive and successful in school.

At Theatretrain, we believe the stage and the classroom go hand in hand. When young people perform, they don’t just entertain – they grow. For further information on Theatretrain please contact Gaynor on 07856 959299 or visit www.theatretrain.co.uk/brighton

Nov 04
Love0
relaxing prengnancy

Nurturing mums-to-be: The gentle benefits of pregnancy massage and holistic care

By beauty, family, Mental health
by Miki Hussein
Sunflower Holistic Massage

Pregnancy is exciting, life-changing and full of joy, but it can also be tiring. A growing bump often brings sore backs, swollen ankles, restless nights and more stress than you’d like. One simple way to ease some of that is with pregnancy massage. It’s gentle, safe, and designed to help you feel comfortable again. If you are expecting, massage can be a wonderful way to take care of yourself. Alongside reflexology and holistic facials, it helps you relax, release tension and feel more connected to your body as it changes.

Why massage helps during pregnancy
Your body is working harder than ever. As your bump grows, your centre of gravity shifts and that can mean discomfort in the lower back, hips and pelvis. A specially trained pregnancy massage therapist will use side-lying positions and supportive pillows so you feel secure. Massage eases tired muscles, improves circulation and can help with swelling in the feet and ankles. Many women also find they sleep better afterwards.

The National Childbirth Trust (NCT) and UK health professionals note that massage can reduce stress, improve posture, ease headaches caused by tension and help with mood. When your body feels more at ease, you’re more likely to rest well and cope better with the day-to-day.

The emotional side of massage
A lovely extra benefit of regular massage sessions during pregnancy or after birth is the chance to talk with someone who understands. A therapist experienced with maternity work has supported many women through the same ups and downs. That safe space to share how you’re feeling can be hugely reassuring. You might discover that the odd sensations, strange twinges or concerns you’ve noticed are all perfectly common. Sometimes just hearing “That’s normal” is enough to put your mind at ease.

Other supportive therapies: reflexology, facials and holistic treatments
Massage isn’t the only option. Reflexology is a gentle therapy using pressure points on the feet that link to different areas of the body. Many mums-to-be find it helps ease backache, nausea or water retention, as well as promoting better sleep.

Holistic facials can also be a treat in pregnancy. Hormonal changes often affect skin, leaving it dry, oily or more sensitive. A pregnancy-safe facial using gentle products soothes, hydrates and gives you a glow without irritation. These treatments are relaxing as well as practical, helping you feel cared for when your body is changing.

Why organic products matter
Your skin is your body’s largest organ, and while there’s no need to worry, it makes sense to choose carefully what you put on it. During pregnancy skin is often more sensitive, so organic products are a great choice. Therapists who use Soil Association certified skincare avoid unnecessary chemicals and synthetic fragrances. It’s about peace of mind, knowing that what’s being massaged into your skin is safe for both you and your bump.

Safety and timing
NHS advice says that massage is generally safe after the first trimester if you’re healthy, but always check with your midwife or GP if you have complications. Some oils aren’t suitable, and positions need adjusting, so it’s important to see a therapist who is trained in maternity work. Reflexology and facials are also safe when carried out by someone experienced in pregnancy care.

After the baby arrives
Massage doesn’t stop being useful once your little one is here. Postnatal massage helps with tired shoulders from feeding, sore backs from carrying and the general exhaustion of those early weeks. It boosts circulation, aids recovery and gives you precious time to recharge.

Reflexology or a calming facial can also be lovely ways to feel balanced again. Having that hour to yourself is more than pampering; it’s an investment in your wellbeing and helps you feel stronger, calmer and ready to enjoy time with your baby.

Putting it all together
Imagine this: you wake up, bump feeling heavy, back sore from sleep. After a pregnancy massage you feel lighter, more mobile, tension lifted from your shoulders. That evening you finally get a deeper sleep. Add in the relaxation of reflexology or the freshness of a holistic facial and the benefits build week by week. Less stress, fewer aches, more comfort and more confidence.

Pregnancy massage and other holistic therapies are not indulgences. They are supportive, practical ways to make life easier and more enjoyable during this special time – and beyond.

Miki is a mum of four and a therapist with over 20 years’ experience. She has treated hundreds of pregnant women, and while she works with all kinds of clients, supporting mums-to-be is what she loves most. Based in Worthing, Miki uses beautiful organic products such as Pink’s Boutique, and also offers reflexology and holistic facials in a calm, caring space. For further information please visit www.sunflowerholisticmassage.com

Nov 02
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resilient child

The role of resilience in learning

By Education, Mental health, numeracy skills, reading, Uncategorized
by Katie Morgan
Head of Pre-Prep, Great Ballard

Helping your child reach their academic potential

Childhood isn’t something to be hurried through or outgrown. It’s something to be treasured, protected and nurtured. Children should have the opportunity to climb trees, sit around campfires and learn what it means to be both independent and part of a community – and this spirit of curiosity and courage is just as important in the classroom as it is outdoors.

When it comes to learning, resilience plays a key role in helping children reach their academic potential. It’s not just about doing well in tests or ticking off tasks, it’s about developing the internal tools to keep going when things get difficult, to bounce back from mistakes and to believe in their ability to grow and improve. Resilient children are not immune to failure, they embrace it. They understand that setbacks are not signs of weakness, but opportunities to learn and adapt. They try, fall short, reassess and try again. And perhaps most importantly, they don’t rely solely on being ‘clever’ or ‘naturally gifted’ at something. Instead, they develop the mindset that effort, persistence and making mistakes are what lead to success.

This shift in thinking is at the heart of Growth Mindset, a concept introduced by psychologist Carol Dweck. Children (and adults) with a Growth Mindset believe that intelligence and ability are not fixed traits but can be developed with effort and time. Contrast that with a Fixed Mindset, where children might say, “I’m not good at maths,” or “I’ll never be picked for the cricket team.” These beliefs become self-fulfilling prophecies, halting progress before it even begins. Instead, we can help children shift their internal dialogue to something more empowering: “I can’t do this yet”, “If I keep practising, I’ll get there.” Parents play a critical role in shaping this thinking. Praising effort over outcome: “You worked so hard on that project,” rather than “You’re so smart” reinforces the idea that what matters is the process, not just the result.

This starts early – as toddlers learn to walk they wobble, they fall and they try again, undeterred. We cheer them on with gentle encouragement: “You can do it! Have another go!” In that moment, we instinctively understand that struggling is essential. But as children grow, and academic expectations increase, we sometimes lose sight of that truth. We want to protect them from frustration and disappointment, but in doing so, we risk stealing the very struggle that helps build resilience. Even our well-meaning attempts to comfort can unintentionally undermine a child’s sense of capability. Phrases like “Don’t worry, you don’t need to be good at everything” or “You’ll drop that subject soon anyway” send the message that some things are simply beyond their reach. But what children really need to hear is that persistence matters, that making mistakes is part of the journey and that with effort, they can get better.

One of the most practical things we can do is to help our children set meaningful goals. Not just the daily adult-led ‘to-do list’ goals like finishing homework or tidying their room but the ‘big dream’ goals that come from their own passions and interests. Whether it’s building a LEGO castle, learning a skateboard trick or writing a story, self-directed goals build motivation and show children what it feels like to work towards something that matters to them. Setting goals also taps into how our brains are wired. Every time we reach a milestone, our brains release dopamine (the ‘feel good’ chemical associated with achievement). Even the act of planning toward a goal can boost motivation. Children feel empowered when they take ownership of their aspirations, and that confidence carries over into more challenging areas of learning. When we combine that with a strong sense of perseverance (the ability to keep going despite setbacks), we’re giving our children a powerful foundation.

One effective strategy is to help them build a ‘catalogue of proof’: a mental (or even physical) list of things they’ve overcome. From learning to ride a bike to performing in a play, these small wins show children that they are capable, even when things are hard. Later, when they’re struggling with a spelling test or a tricky bit of maths, they can draw on that evidence: I’ve done hard things before, I can do this too.

Equally important is helping them see their mistakes not as failures, but as part of the process. Talk openly about your own errors and what you’ve learned from them. Instead of focusing solely on results, provide feedback that highlights strategy, effort and progress. Ask open-ended questions: “What did you try?” “What might you do differently next time?” “What worked well?” All of this takes time, patience and consistency. Resilience doesn’t happen overnight, it’s something we nurture over months and years, through small everyday moments. A bedtime chat about what went well today. A word of encouragement when homework feels tough. A quiet moment spent really listening to what’s on their mind, no matter how little it may seem.

It may also help to build habits around gratitude. Research shows that practising gratitude, whether through simple conversations at dinnertime or by journaling, boosts mental wellbeing. A child who regularly reflects on what they’re thankful for is more likely to maintain perspective during difficult moments. Their ‘gratitude bank’ becomes a buffer against life’s inevitable bumps.

Finally, let’s not forget the power of environment and routine. Small acts of ‘situational support’ (laying out clothes the night before, putting their bag by the front door or setting up a dedicated homework space) can reduce stress and build a sense of control and independence.

Helping children become resilient learners isn’t about shielding them from difficulty, it’s about walking alongside them as they navigate it. It’s about fostering curiosity, celebrating effort and creating space for them to struggle, reflect and grow. Because academic potential isn’t just about what a child knows. It’s about how they respond when they don’t know something – yet.

Great Ballard is a small school with big ambitions, providing affordable education from Nursery to GCSE. We believe wellbeing is the foundation that allows the real learning to happen. www.greatballard.co.uk

Nov 01
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smiling girl

Educating the whole child

By Education, Mental health
by Kirsty Keep, Francesca Milling and Matt Thomas
Heads of the Lancing College Preparatory Schools – Lancing Preps Hove & Worthing and Dorset House

Why character matters as much as curriculum

In an age where academic achievement often takes centre stage, it’s easy to overlook the quieter, yet equally vital, aspects of a child’s development. Prep schools are increasingly recognising that success in life is not measured solely by exam results, but by the strength of a child’s character, how they treat others, how they respond to challenges and how they understand themselves.

Character education is not a new concept, but it has taken on renewed importance in recent years. Schools are placing greater emphasis on nurturing values such as kindness, empathy, resilience and integrity. These qualities are not taught in isolation but are embedded in the daily life of most schools – through assemblies, classroom discussions, peer interactions and the way staff model behaviour.

Children thrive in environments where they feel safe, respected and heard. When schools create a culture that values emotional intelligence as much as academic performance, children are more likely to take risks, express themselves and develop a genuine love of learning. They become more confident, more compassionate and better equipped to navigate the complexities of growing up.

One of the most powerful tools in this approach is the development of emotional literacy. Helping children to recognise and regulate their emotions from an early age builds a foundation for lifelong wellbeing. It also fosters empathy. When children understand their own feelings, they are better able to understand the feelings of others.

This is particularly important in the early years, when children are still learning how to navigate social situations and build relationships. Encouraging children to talk about their emotions, reflect on their behaviour and understand the impact of their actions helps them to develop a strong sense of self and a deeper connection to those around them.

Schools that focus on both character education alongside academic achievement often adopt proactive strategies to support emotional development. These may include mindfulness activities, peer mentoring and structured programmes that teach self-regulation and resilience. Such initiatives not only help children manage their emotions but also empower them to ask for help when they need it.

Importantly, this approach to education doesn’t mean lowering academic standards. On the contrary, children who feel emotionally supported are more likely to engage deeply with their learning. They are more resilient in the face of setbacks and more motivated to achieve their personal best. When children are taught to value effort, kindness and curiosity, they become learners who are not only capable but also courageous.

Educating the whole child means recognising that every child is unique, with their own strengths, challenges and potential. It means creating a school environment where values are lived, not just taught. It means preparing children not just for the next stage of their education, but for life.

In a world that is constantly changing, the ability to adapt, empathise and lead with integrity is more important than ever. By placing character at the heart of education, prep schools are helping to shape a generation of young people who will not only succeed academically but also contribute positively to their communities in the future.

The Lancing College family includes its two Prep Schools located in Hove and Worthing, Dorset House School in Pulborough and Little Lancing Day Nursery & Forest School.
www.lancingcollege.co.uk, www.lancingprephove.co.uk, www.lancingprepworthing.co.uk, www.dorsethouseschool.com, www.littlelancing.co.uk

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