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Ten little things to do with the family

By Education, fun for children, Mental health

Mums, dads, and carers across the UK can often run out of ideas of what they can do for fun entertainment with their children when they are at home. Here, Gabriella Egleton, UK Brand Marketing Manager for Bebeto sweets, has compiled her top 10 little things you can do to help keep the whole family entertained during free time.

1 Start a feather collection. When out walking keep your eyes peeled for unusual bird feathers. From magpies to pigeons, you’ll be amazed at how beautiful some feathers are.

2 Grow some herbs. Instead of buying fresh herbs, invest in a few packets of seeds and let the children watch them grow. As the kids grew them, they will be more likely to try to see what they taste like.

3 Have an indoor scavenger hunt. Create a list of items and set a time limit to find a range of different objects around the house. Objects could include a sock, a pencil, and a book. And of course, you’ll need a bag to collect the objects.

4 Make your own board game. Come together as a family and brainstorm what your boardgame is going to be about, the object of the game and the rules. Then, as a team, set about creating it together.

5 Make paper planes or paper dolls. Host a paper plane throwing competition and see whose creation can fly the furthest. Alternatively, cut out paper doll chains and decorate them. Once completed you can attach lolly sticks to either end and make the dolls dance for you. Maybe you could then host a puppet show with them.

6 Make an indoor den. Raid the airing cupboard for blankets, towels and cushions and build a den in the sitting room. This activity offers hours of fun as the den could become a castle or a tent.It will grow with your child’s imagination.

7 Compile a list of things you have enjoyed or are thankful for. Every day add an activity or event to the list that has made your child happy. This will become a memory for your child to treasure in years to come.

8 Host an indoor picnic. Inject some fun into lunchtime by hosting a picnic on the kitchen floor. Grab your rug, sandwiches, and crisps for a lunchtime with a twist.

9 Draw with your eyes closed. Art is always a nice way to fill time but why not try drawing objects, places, and people with your eyes closed. You might surprise yourself.

10 Hold a talent show. Some people have natural talents, and others have ones they haven’t uncovered yet.Whether you have one or not maybe you could learn something new to show the family like a magic trick, whistling with your fingers, or juggling. The list is endless. Enjoy!

Bebeto is available at all good convenience stores nationwide.

For further information please visit www.bebeto.co.uk or find them at Bebetouk on Facebook.

First aid for parents

By baby health, children's health, Education, Safety
by Feola McCandlish
Daisy First Aid

Would you know what to do if your child choked, swallowed something they shouldn’t have, hit their head, was burned, had a seizure or fell unconscious? Would you know how to recognise the early stages of meningitis or a severe allergic reaction?

No parent wants to think about their child being harmed; but unfortunately accidents do happen and learning essential first aid skills can make all the difference in an emergency situation.

What is first aid?
First aid is the immediate treatment given to a person before medical help arrives. Your first actions while you wait for an ambulance can make all the difference and can sometimes even mean the difference between life and death.

There is so much to think about when you have a baby and it’s understandable that first aid might not be at the top of your list – especially when you are sleep-deprived and trying to figure out how to keep your tiny human alive.

Learning first aid can be scary, particularly when it is our own children we are talking about, but it doesn’t have to be. Learning first aid with like-minded people in a relaxed and informal environment can actually be a lot of fun.

Perfect for pregnancy
Did you know you can do a first aid class when you are expecting? It’s safe to do during pregnancy and it’s something you can tick off that ever-growing list of things to do! Learn with your antenatal group, friends and family.

Choking
Lots of parents, understandably, worry about choking when they are beginning to wean their baby. Did you know that babies have extremely sensitive gag reflexes, which are there to help keep your baby safe from choking?

When a baby is weaning it’s completely normal to experience a lot of coughing, gagging and going red in the face. A common misconception is that you will hear a person choking but you won’t; severe choking is usually completely silent. Knowing the difference between gagging and severe choking is really important, particularly when you are about to wean your baby. If they’re coughing and going red in the face that’s a great sign, we can usually let them work it out themselves; if they’re silent and turning blue they need our help.

Doing a first aid class can put your mind at ease when it comes to weaning your baby so you can relax and enjoy the process (and focus on cleaning the mess!) and feel confident that you know what steps to take if your baby does choke.

Not just for babies
It’s not just babies who sometimes require first aid. Once your child is mobile, a whole new world will open up to them; it’s an exciting time for them and you! Young children love putting things in their mouths. Did you know this is for sensory reasons? They have more nerve endings in their mouths than they do in their fingers so they find out more about an object if they put it in their mouth! But this obviously poses a choking risk.

Once your child is walking, running and climbing it’s normal for blows to the head to become a fairly regular occurrence (at least, they are in our house!) Would you know how to treat a head injury? And would you know what signs to look out for in a serious head injury?

Learning vital first aid skills gives confidence to parents and other child carers so that they would know what to do in an emergency involving their baby or child. All it takes is two hours.

Daisy First Aid teaches award-winning courses to parents, expectant parents and children all over Sussex in homes and public venues. They also provide OFSTED compliant courses for teachers and childcare professionals in local venues and private settings. For more information visit www.daisyfirstaid.com

The true value of curiosity

By Education, fun for children
by Tiger Cox
Explorer and author

When I returned home to Sussex after a year sailing the world with my parents, I enrolled in a new school and quickly became aware that my life until this point had been lived inside a bubble, surrounded by people who valued nature and exploration.

Now I was a lamb among the wolves, a Waldorf Steiner educated 13 year old with no street cred and a strange name, sitting in my first national curriculum religious education lesson wondering if throwing things at the teacher was perhaps a group learning activity set before my arrival? Alas it was not. Despite my lack of familiarity with the state education system (I had never even sat a formal test, let alone an exam), I retained a curiosity and love of learning that many of my peers had lost years before. In the next three years I would pass 13 GCSE’s and three A-levels in maths, physics and programming. So how did I stay curious and apply what I had learned outdoors to academia?

outdoor-skillsThe world at large
“Nature is the source of all true knowledge. She has her own logic, her own laws, she has no effect without cause nor invention without necessity.”
– Leonardo da Vinci

In June 2011 my parents and I went travelling by sea. As we sailed from our home harbour of Newhaven, a few family and friends waved teary eyed from the shore (tears unconfirmed). What they saw was a dumpy three ton catamaran, with two masts and netting spread between her wooden hulls like a badly designed trawler. Despite her considerable weight, and length (32ft), cabin space was, let’s say,”cosy”.

My bunk was additionally cramped by a complete set of homeschooling books. Stacks of Key Stage 2 maths worksheets, a science set with an ammeter and powerful light bulbs (our solar panels just about managed to light two LED strips), and enough classic novels to get me up to speed on English literature. Some of those novels I would eventually become bored enough to read, such as Jack London’s ‘White Fang’ which I finished off the coast of Portugal. A brilliant book! The vast majority of that homeschooling kit however, stayed safely stored below my bunk where, the last time I checked a few years ago, it remained.

While my parents bickered about the setting of the anchor, I focused on fishing. I fished for pollock to feed my pet seagull, I fished for mackerel using homemade lures, I fished for sardines in Spain alongside toothless old men, and for skipjack tuna chased by dolphins in the Canary Islands. In Morroco the water was so dirty I dared not fish at all. I learned about the tides and the weather, about materials and lengths of line, weights of fish and water pollution. I learned about people too, our many languages and similarities. Without really knowing it, I covered the homeschool curriculum. Everything tied back to fishing. Looking back now, I see that fishing could have been photography, or fossil collecting, or a fascination with different types of pizza. It really doesn’t matter what that focus is, because connections can be made everywhere. It is simply learning by leading with reward, a pursuit that is already enjoyed.

Using the spirit of adventure to your advantage
“Okay Tiger, I get it, lead with reward, use the outdoor classroom, but we can’t all go live on a boat, and my children don’t have one thing they are interested in for more than a week…”

Perhaps the answer to many people’s concerns about children spending less time outdoors than prison inmates, is to use more imaginative storytelling. I just told you a story about my adventures living on a boat. I led with that story because I know it is more captivating than “let’s talk about outdoor learning”. I am not the first to lead with stories. For thousands of years, the Aboriginal peoples passed down their knowledge of nature through stories, the characters in the stories were captivating and young people practiced their teachings. Here in the West, we have made stories from explorers in history part of our culture, but do we use them to motivate young people enough? I don’t think so. The story of Mathew Henson reaching the North Pole, perhaps being the first person to get there and at a time when men of colour were considered less, is certainly inspiring. But it feels far off, almost like he was born to explore and we are not. The truth is, all great explorers in history started playing with a compass in the back garden. If we can communicate this to our young people, and enable them to start practicing basic outdoors skills, reading the weather or making rope from scratch, then spending time outdoors becomes more like being part of an interesting story, rather than a waste of time.

Creative problem solvers as the celebrated explorers of the future?
I imagine that creative problem solvers will be the celebrated explorers of the future. There are no more unknown seas to cross or foreign lands to find. There is only the deep ocean, outer space, and a whole lot of problems here on Earth. All of which are going to require some serious problem solving. As humans, we often turn to tool use to solve our problems. Technology is our latest tool and it is a powerful one, but we must not forget that nature has spent three billion years solving problems, far longer than humans. We can learn from nature, but we need to make sure that our young people retain their curiosity, for with it will come perspective.

I wrote my first book, How To Be An Explorer, for this very reason. For months I wrote down every outdoor skill I had enjoyed as a youngster, and the stories of explorers in history who inspired me. Then I selected my six favorite stories and 25 most rewarding activities, and broke them down into something easy to read and put into practice. Photographs and illustrations followed. Now I’m hoping, really hoping, that the book we’ve created is enough to spark a curiosity for nature and the outdoors in a few young people’s minds. For the true value of curiosity is that it gives you perspective, and the younger you gain perspective, the more freedom of choice you have throughout your life. Freedom of choice is a beautiful thing.

How to be an Explorer by Tiger Cox, Button Books, RRP £16.99, available online and from all good bookshops.

 

Talk PANTS and stay safe

By children's health, Education, Relationships, Safety

From an early age we talk to children about how to stay safe. We teach them how to cross the road safely and not to run with scissors. But some subjects can be trickier to discuss than others. For example – sexual abuse. Where on earth do you start?

Talking about sexual abuse with children can feel like a daunting prospect. It’s something you hope you never have to discuss and you might feel that if you do; you’ll scare them or take away their innocence.

But the truth is abuse happens and we need to talk about it to keep children safe. During the year 2019/20, police forces across the UK recorded more than 73,500 child sex offences – an increase of 57% over five years. By talking about it from an early age, potentially before it even takes place, we can help children speak up if something happens that worries them.

But talking about abuse doesn’t need to be a scary thing and we can show you how. You can start by teaching them the NSPCC’s Underwear Rule, or PANTS. Since the NSPCC launched its PANTS campaign in 2013, it has sparked over 1.5 million conversations between adults and their children to help keep them safe from abuse.

PANTS stands for:
Privates are private
Your underwear covers up your private parts and no one should ask to see or touch them. Sometimes a doctor, nurse or family members might have to. But they should always explain why and ask you if it’s OK first.

Always remember your body belongs to you
Your body belongs to you. No one should ever make you do things that make you feel embarrassed or uncomfortable. If someone asks to see or tries to touch you underneath your underwear say ‘NO’ – and tell someone you trust and like to speak to.

No means no
No means no, and you always have the right to say ‘no’ – even to a family member or someone you love. You’re in control of your body and the most important thing is how YOU feel. If you want to say ‘No’, it’s your choice.

Talk about secrets that upset you
There are good and bad secrets. Good secrets can be things like surprise parties or presents for other people. Bad secrets make you feel sad, worried or frightened. You should tell an adult you trust about a bad secret straight away.

Speak up, someone can help
Talk about stuff that makes you worried or upset. If you ever feel sad, anxious or frightened you should talk to an adult you trust. This doesn’t have to be a family member. It can also be a teacher or a friend’s parent – or even Childline.

Next, you’ll need to pick the right time to start talking about it. The right time is… anytime! It’s important to make it part of everyday conversations you might have with your child so that it doesn’t feel forced or as though it’s a big deal. Some examples are:
• During bath time, when applying cream or when getting your child dressed.
• During car journeys – it’s a neutral space and it might be easier to get their undivided attention.
• Going swimming is the perfect time to explain that what’s covered by swimwear is private.
• During a TV show that features a sensitive storyline – you could ask them what they would do in that situation and encourage them to think about adults they trust and could speak to about a problem.

There’s even a video for you to sing along to with your child, to help them learn the Underwear Rule. The yellow, cuddly, pant-wearing dinosaur mascot, Pantosaurus, sings and dances his way through these important safeguarding messages but it’s fun and incredibly catchy.

Singing not really your thing? Don’t worry – you can always read the PANTS book together. Pantosaurus and the Power of Pants follows the story of Pantosaurus as he receives a new pair of pants. Dinodad tells him that they will give him special powers. Pantosaurus then experiences a problem at school and just as Dinodad told him, his super pants give him the power to speak up.

There are lots of other sources of support available on the NSPCC website – www.nspcc.org.uk/pants. You can sign up for regular emails with tips and advice, download free PANTS guides in 16 different languages and sing along to the Pantosaurs video.

There are also PANTS activity packs, and Pantosaurus and the Power of Pants is available to buy in the NSPCC online shop – shop.nspcc.org.uk

For further advice and support, the NSPCC’s Helpline is available Monday to Friday 8am – 10pm or 9am – 6pm at the weekends. Trained professionals can offer tips and advice and can help you if you have concerns about a child. You can call them free and in confidence on 0808 800 5000 or visit www.nspcc.org.uk/helpline

30 things to do before you’re five

By Education, environment, fun for children

Following two years of disruption to daily routines, parents can now show their children new experiences they have missed out on.

Together with Nick Jr. UK Blue’s Clues & You series and a panel of celebrity parents, they have put together this ‘bucket list’ to get children out exploring and to help feed their curiosity.

From climbing trees and going underwater for the first time, to building a sandcastle on the beach and camping in the garden, the activities are all based around the simple pleasures that come with being able to explore.

1. Pebble painting
2. Feed the ducks
3. Write a letter to a family member and post it
4. Go underwater
5. Paddle in the sea
6. Get dressed up in fancy dress
7. Litter pick
8. Go to a castle
9. Have a water fight and soak your parents from head to toe
10. Go mudlarking and see who can find the grossest thing
11. Get some chalk and do some pavement art
12. Spend a night camping in your back garden
13. Ride on a scooter
14. Climb a tree
15. Go to the park
16. Explore the neighbourhood
17. Find stones and leaves and make a collage
18. Watch a film at the cinema
19. Go to the beach and build a sandcastle
20. Kick a ball around
21. Learn catch
22. Visit the farm/zoo
23. Host a picnic with your teddy bears
24. Bake something with parents or grandparents
25. Fly a kite
26. Face painting
27. Build a den
28. Blow dandelions
29. Make a mini beast hotel
30. Make pizza.

How to raise eco-friendly children

By Education, environment

With the global population growing every year, it’s becoming more important than ever to raise children to care for the environment. Here, James Partridge from Greenshop, (www.greenshop.co.uk) offers some tips on encouraging your children to be eco-friendly.

Data from Population Matters has shown that the global population is going up by 80 million every year, meaning it could reach 9.7 billion by 2050, meaning we might put more of a strain on the earth’s resources. This has led to a conversation around how to bring up the next generation so that they care for and prioritise the planet. To help you understand how to encourage your children to be eco-friendly and enjoy caring for the environment, we’ve brought together some tips to get you started.

By spending time outside with your children, getting them started in gardening, and showing them how much fun it can be to learn about the planet, you can ensure that your little ones will grow up knowing about the importance of preserving the environment.

Take your family outside
The easiest way to get your children enthusiastic about the environment is to get them outside and into nature. Not only does this encourage them to care about the planet, but it also brings a whole host of mental and physical health benefits, as noted by the charity Mind (www.mind.org.uk) So, take the whole family for a walk, play in the park, or sign your little ones up to an outside activities group.

While you’re outside, you can also talk to your children about nature, and it’s a great time to get them learning about insects, plants, trees, and birds. This will introduce your children to the environment and get them into the habit of exploring the landscape around them.

Take your children out to see animals
Being able to be around animals is extremely good for children and can encourage them to take an interest in the natural world, teaching them to protect it for wildlife as well as ourselves. Some fun activities to take part in are visiting wildlife sanctuaries and going on bird watching trips. There are also petting farms that will let your children meet and learn about animals, and wildlife trails where they can look for beetles, snails, and squirrels.

When your children are old enough to help with an animal’s care, it can be excellent to get a pet. This can show your children how to be responsible for their four-legged companion and can be a fun way for them to get in touch with nature.

Do some gardening
Another great way to introduce your children to environmental awareness and enjoyment of nature is to start doing some gardening with them. They will enjoy planting seeds and watching them grow, learning about all the different tasks that need to be done in the garden throughout the seasons, and watering the flowers.

Spring is a good time to begin choosing seeds and plants to try out, and easy ways to start are with herbs such as parsley and basil, or fruit plants such as strawberries. Flowers are also an option, but edible choices such as nasturtiums are good options as children can enjoy tasting them when they have grown.

Teach your children to recycle
Recycling is another activity that’s accessible to children and can get them excited about the environment. Showing them which items can be recycled, and how to split everything up into categories (such as paper, glass, and plastic) is a fun way to start them on their eco-friendly journey.

You can also tell them about all the different things that can be made from the recycled materials, and for older children, it might be a good idea to make them responsible for one of the recycling sections, paper recycling for example.

Show children how to mend their things
Mending things is an important skill, and a key way to get our belongings to last longer rather than throwing them away. This creates less waste, and can be a fun DIY activity to involve your children in. You can also find patterns and new techniques to use when mending clothes and other belongings, in order to make them look unique and have more fun with the mending process.

These are all great activities for a rainy day and can keep children occupied for a while as well as teaching important skills. Try looking on YouTube for mending and craft projects – as well as repairing, you can try turning old clothes, cardboard, and paper scraps into new craft projects.

There are lots of ways to encourage your children to be more eco-friendly, so that they will have a lifelong love of nature. Getting them outside, involving them in gardening, and showing them how to care for their belongings and do simple actions like recycling, can all contribute to them growing up to be eco-conscious adults in the future. It will also open up some fun, engaging pastimes for you and your little ones to enjoy.

Greenshop is an ideal starting point to source organic, fair trade, free from and ethically sensitive products and we are passionate about conservation and reducing the use of plastic, bringing many solution products to our customers. www.greenshop.co.uk

 

Why parenting with anxiety makes you a ‘super-parent’

By children's health, Education, Mental health
The last couple of years have been tough for everyone. The COVID pandemic has left many adults and children feeling uncertain, stressed and anxious at times. Several pieces of research have highlighted the heavy burden this period has put on parents of young children. If you are a parent or carer you may have found things overwhelming at times. You are not alone in those feelings. Almost every mum and dad across the country will have done so at some point.

At the Parenting with Anxiety Team we specialise in supporting families. We hope that the following will provide some useful information and reassurance. But also remember that you are the expert on your family.

Parents with anxiety are ‘super-parents’
From our work with parents we know that almost all of them go to massive efforts to do what is best for their children and that they are doing this while managing their own anxiety. Think of Ginger Rogers doing everything Fred Astaire did, but backwards in high heels. It is not easy!

We know that all parents can think they are not doing a good enough job, so it was great to hear a mother we work with describe anxious parents as ‘super-parents’. And they are! Super at managing their anxiety at the same time as juggling the demands of parenthood. If you are in this situation, take a moment to recognise that you are super too.

You are just one part of what makes your child who they are
If you find yourself experiencing anxiety, you may worry about the impact it has on your children. You may notice that they express some anxious feelings of their own. If that is the case remember that a huge number of different factors contribute to making your child the amazing individual he or she is. It is not all down to you. It is also worth remembering that when your child is anxious your understanding of your own anxiety can give you special insight into what they are going through.

Your child’s anxieties are not your own
When you feel anxious, your child’s worries can be overwhelming. It can be useful to remember that all children worry at times and it is perfectly normal. Sometimes you might be tempted to step in and fix things for them, so they don’t have the same experiences you did.

School experiences can be a point when we transplant the feelings we have about our experiences onto our children. But their experiences are different and the things which worry us may not affect them in the same way. Similarly, when your child is worried about something you do not have to share those feelings. If you can step back a little from their worries you will be better able to help them cope with them. This is not always easy and don’t beat yourself up if you do find yourself sharing their fears.

If you are worried, encourage your child to talk, and listen
Just by noticing that something is going on for your child you have already shown real sensitivity. The next thing to do is support them to share what they are feeling. You do not necessarily have to solve things – you might not be able to and that is OK. If worries are coming up at bedtime focus on soothing them and try and have a gentle conversation about it at another time. Sometimes it can help to have a chat while you are both more relaxed, for example in the car, while playing or walking back from the shops.

To find out more about the project at the University of Sussex please visit www.parentingwithanxiety.org.uk

tranny-kids-chatting

Everyone deserves the right to communication

By Education, Language, Relationships

What is a speech and language therapist and how can they help your child? As a child develops there is an expectation that they will reach certain milestones in their development. This includes their speech, language and communication skills.

Sometimes, children can take longer to meet these milestones, often requiring a little extra time but sometimes they need some support. It is important to remember that no child’s communication journey will be the same, every child takes a different speed.

However, if a child is struggling on their communication journey a speech and language therapist (SLT) is there to help.

Who do we work with?
A SLT is focused on communication and all the different aspects associated with communication. From speech skills to language skills, comprehension skills, attention skills, eating and drinking skills, social skills and fluency skills. The list goes on and on, many people assume our role is similar to that seen in ‘The King’s Speech’. Focusing on a stutter or working on the pronunciation of a sound. However, a SLT works with children as young as two years old and with varying difficulties.

SLT’s work with children with a range of diagnoses such as:
• Speech and language delay
• Developmental language disorder (DLD)
• Speech disorders
• Autistic spectrum disorders
• Disfluency (stuttering/stammering)
• Cleft lip and palate
• Learning difficulties
• Developmental delay
• Down Syndrome
• Social communication delay
• Comprehension delay
• Attention and listening delay
• Swallowing conditions.

Why is a speech and language therapist just playing with my child?
Children learn best when they do not realise they are learning. Play provides vast opportunities for communication, whether that communication is expressed through eye gaze, gesture or talking. Play allows a child to explore the world around them, to share attention with you and to engage. So, whilst it may look as though a SLT is just playing with your child, every toy and activity will be encouraging and developing your child’s communication skills.

I have concerns about my child’s communication skills, should I just wait and see?
Often as a parent, we can become concerned about our child’s abilities. Naturally, we begin to compare them to other children. We can go back and forth with concerns around whether we should seek help or whether we should wait and see. Early intervention is key with communication difficulties – the longer a difficulty is left the harder it can be to resolve and the greater the impact on a child’s overall communication abilities. Diagnosing a delay or condition early can drastically improve the outcome of a child’s communication journey.

If you are concerned about your child’s communication skills, have a chat with a SLT. Most independent practitioners will offer a free phone call to discuss any concerns you have and offer advice.

What should I expect from my first speech and language therapy session?
Usually, the initial session is an assessment session. This is often an informal chat with the parents, finding out your concerns, your child’s developmental history and gaining insight into your child’s interests. Then, the SLT will play with your child, informally assessing their abilities holistically. A child is very unlikely to know it is an assessment – my initial assessment checklist includes bubbles, animals, a pop-up pirate and trains!

If you have any concerns about your child’s communication, no matter how small, don’t delay in contacting a SLT. Everyone deserves the right to communication. We can talk about your concerns and offer you tailored advice and plan the next steps in supporting you and your child. The longer a concern is left, the harder it is to resolve. So contact your local SLT today!

Help Me to Talk provide engaging sessions at home, nursery, school and virtually to families across Surrey. For children as young as two years old. Get in touch today! www.helpmetotalk.co.uk 07799 677262

 

The communication and capabilities of a newborn baby

By baby health, Education, Language, play, Relationships, sleep
by Karen Emery
Founder of Haven & Base,
Perinatal Practitioner, Parent Coach & Children’s Sleep Advisor

It wasn’t too long ago that we thought newborn babies couldn’t do much at all, other than eat, sleep and cry. But the exact opposite is true. Newborn babies are born with amazing communication capabilities and are primed and ready for social contact with their parents and caregivers right from birth. More importantly, brain science has shown us just how important this early communication is between a baby and their parent for a baby’s brain development.

Many parents are unaware that a human baby is born with an undeveloped brain and that a baby’s brain and nervous system grows most rapidly in the first few years following birth. A baby’s brain grows and develops in response to their environment but crucially in response to the interactions that a baby shares with their parent(s) and caregivers. Communication is more than talking. It’s any form of message sent from one party to another through sounds, words, or physical hints like body language. From the first moment that your baby is placed in your arms, you and your baby will be communicating with each other. These first glances, sounds, and touches literally shape the way in which your baby’s brain will grow and develop.

Everyone knows that babies cry but did you know that every baby has their own crying repertoire? Every baby has a unique and different cry for a different reason. Unlike other mammal babies, human babies are born completely dependent upon their parent or caregiver for survival and their ability to cry is very important for alerting an adult that something is wrong, or a change is needed. Babies have different cries for different reasons: a hungry baby may cry in a low or short pitched tone, while a baby who is angry or upset may cry in a choppier tone. As your baby grows, you as a parent will be able to recognise and understand what need that your baby is expressing. Even if we as parents cannot always work out why our baby is crying and what our baby is trying to express to us, it’s always important to respond to your baby’s cry for help. Responding to your baby’s cries (even when we may not know what they are crying for) helps to make your baby feel safe, secure, listened to, and heard. You cannot spoil a baby when you are meeting their physical and emotional needs.

Babies love talking! Although a baby doesn’t say a meaningful word until they are about a year old, they love to ‘take turns’ communicating with you as a parent or caregiver with facial expressions, gurgles, coo’s and body language. Why not give this a try? Find a moment when your baby is quiet but alert and give this ‘turn taking’ a go. Position your baby in front of you gazing into their eyes. What ever your baby does – you copy. If your baby gurgles, you gurgle back. Always wait for your baby to respond. This is a beautiful way to connect with your baby but don’t expect a full-blown conversation for hours at a time. Newborns can only manage this type of interaction for a few moments at each sitting before it can become over stimulating for their immature nervous system. As your baby grows and develops you can spend longer gazing at one another and conversing for longer periods each time but it’s always best to follow your baby’s lead. When your baby has had enough, they may look away, grimace, arch their back or posset (spit up milk). Crying is usually the last signal that your baby has had enough, and a change is needed.

This is the second article of three in a series about babies. In my final article, which will be available in the summer edition, I will discuss sleep tips for babies aged from birth until three months old.

You can learn more about how to communicate with your baby by visiting www.havenandbase.com

Karen Emery is available for VIRTUAL one-to-one parent-baby consultations.
You can email her for an appointment at hello@havenandbase.com

Unlocking independent education scholarships and bursaries

By Education, numeracy skills, reading
by Tamara Pearson
Assistant Head, Head of the Junior School Our Lady of Sion, Worthing

Boaters? ‘Hogwarts’ campus? ‘Mallory Towers’ traditions? Maybe. Maybe not. My experience was decidedly different.

Growing up in South East London in the 80s, with a bird’s eye view of The Oval cricket ground, my primary state school was an eclectic and creative start to life. My classes were always large and busy; teacher time was generally spent with children who required additional help. Art projects for the Notting Hill carnival and a chance to perform at the National Theatre were certainly highlights.

However, after discovering my grandma’s Irish harp in her attic, music quickly became an all-consuming passion. Lessons on the edge of Battersea Park were a complete joy. I felt lucky to have found my ‘thing’ and was relishing the chance to play and perform. I played alongside professionals, appeared on television, performed at weddings and regularly played at local care homes. A solo recital in front of the Head of Music at a large public boarding school resulted in a top scholarship and a huge change in my education.

As a scholar, my harp was housed in the Headmaster’s House, where I practiced for hours each day. I sang in the choirs, performing at St George’s Chapel (Windsor), Winchester Cathedral and sang great choral works such as Haydn’s Creation. Orchestral opportunities and coaching in composition were hugely inspiring and further developed my musicianship. As a solo performer, I played at the opening of new buildings in partner schools, governor lunches and formal events – including large charity occasions. As the only harpist at the school (at the time), I was very happy to be literally wheeled out for any occasion.

My scholarship opened up a world of opportunities which far exceeded musical enrichment. Tutorials, workshops, enrichment days, visits and outings, productions, concerts, a huge array of sporting activities and life beyond the classroom. The experience of an independent education was life-changing. To this day, I carry the lasting legacy of my education. It was not just what I learned, but how I learned – the memories and how I was made to feel.

I am forever grateful to have been passed the key which unlocked this opportunity for me. Consequently, I am passionate about ensuring there are similar opportunities available to other families. To be truly known and nurtured by inspirational and passionate teachers, in an environment of ambitious academic discovery, where a joy of learning is fostered is what our children deserve.

Most independent schools offer scholarships for talented pupils. Whilst very competitive, scholarships may offer more in terms of prestige, rather than financial awards. Means-tested bursaries may also be available for families who need financial assistance with fees.

Independent school fees vary considerably and it is important to consider the full picture; additional charges, uniform costs and the full cost of an education through to senior school.

Scholarships can now take many forms. There are traditional academic, music, sport, art and drama awards, as well as more holistic and alternative offerings. Financial awards can vary, as can the complete package of fees.

Scholarships are rarely worth more than around 10% of fees these days. However, scholars may benefit from additional features, such as further coaching, trips/tours, mentoring and enrichment.

Scholarships at prep school level (primary phase) are less common. There tend to be standard entry points for these – usually being at the age of seven. Some prep schools offer ‘exhibitions’ which is the name given for a minor scholarship.

Scholarships may also be available for internal candidates. Again, these are usually made available at key intake points throughout the school at set times in the year.

Bursaries provide financial support for families with talented children who would otherwise not be able to afford full fees. These range in value from school to school – they can also cover additional expenses such as uniform and trips. Whilst based on a child’s ability or talents, bursaries are also means tested, which means that each year the family’s financial standing is inspected by the school bursar. The threshold for support can differ from school to school and it is important to remember that it may not be the only factor of consideration (schools may also look at the number of dependents, other assets and outgoings such as holidays).

It is important to note that schools can award scholarships with bursaries; providing the prestige of a scholarship, with the financial support of a bursary.

Whilst we all see the best in our children, it is imperative to dig deep and be realistic about whether they are ready to apply for a scholarship. It is also wise to carefully consider the school. It can be tempting to be lured by the largest ‘discount’, rather than looking at full costs and even if the school is a perfect fit for your child.

Some tips to consider:
• Research schools and their scholarship and bursary options.
• Compare full and true costs (including any wraparound, meals, uniform and additional expenses such as music lessons/extra-curricular opportunities).
• Check the timing of scholarships and be organised with deadlines.
• Be honest on all application paperwork – about abilities and finances.
• Do not push or pressure your child.
• Keep a sense of proportion and trust that you will find the right school for your child.

Tamara Pearson is Assistant Head, Head of the Junior School at Our Lady of Sion School in Worthing. She is also mother to an eight year old who attends Sion and she is passionate about helping the Juniors embrace every enrichment opportunity available.

Our Lady of Sion Junior School welcomes children from Early Years to Year 6 when children transition to the Senior School. Alongside its Bursaries and Senior School Scholarships, the school has recently launched a new Scholarship for children in Years 1 and 2.

Visit www.sionschool.org.uk