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Nov 08
Love0
forest school

Forest School- what is it all about and why is it so beneficial to children?

By Early Years, Education, environment, Forest School, Green

by Melanie Parr
Managing Director, Lymley Wood CIC

So many people are talking about Forest School at the moment, we thought it would be good idea to explain what it’s all about and why so many children benefit from a day out of the classroom, learning in nature. Forest School takes place in a woodland or natural environment and is aimed to support the development of a lifelong relationship between the learner and the natural world. Forest school is not just taking learning outside, it’s a unique and child centred way for children to learn using their innate curiosity about the natural world, animals and the joy of being allowed to get muddy!

The Forest School movement started in Denmark in the early 1950s as a result of a parent taking her own children and neighbours’ children to gather together in a nearby forest – an unofficial form of daycare which proved popular among other parents in the community. Arriving in the UK in 1993, today Forest School happens all around the world and in the UK has its own association (www.forestschoolassociation.org) that oversees the quality of provisions and provides training for Forest School leaders in order that the settings provide a well-planned, safe and inspiring curriculum for the children attending Forest Schools.

Forest School is a child-centred inspirational learning process, that offers opportunities for holistic growth through regular sessions. It supports play, exploration and supported risk taking. It develops confidence and self-esteem through learner inspired, hands-on experiences in a natural setting. This means that children attend regularly throughout the school year and the curriculum uses the changing seasons and the natural space to support learning. There is also a focus on helping children navigate the social and emotional aspects of learning and education, and for this reason, is a go to option for parents whose children may struggle at a regular school, or for those children who have special educational or additional needs.

Some schools, especially primary schools, have added Forest School to the timetable but nothing is quite the same as the children accessing a woodland space rather than a school field or small area in the school grounds. Forest School is not a ‘subject’. Rather, it’s that all subjects can be taught in a fun and meaningful way but outdoors, Forest School style, instead of in a classroom. If we want to achieve a holistic education that uses play and nature rather than prescribed separated ‘subjects’, then freedom to be allowed to learn at their own pace and guided by a child’s own natural curiosity is key. Maths outcomes can be achieved through counting dug up worms or collected leaves or acorns just as well as with traditional classroom resources. Art lessons using self-made natural dyes and paints, or by creating some ‘land art’ is a fun way to learn creativity. PE on a rope swing, tree climbing or an adventure playground in the trees is a great physical ‘lesson’. Learning history through digging in mud for ‘archaeological remains’ or making a traditional tool using stones and sticks – it really brings learning to life.

A quality Forest School provider will also support children to learn how to manage their own risk and understand their own physical abilities or limitations. This builds safety skills, resilience and a sense of achievement as the children have freedom to undertake personal and physical challenges in a way where they can make their own decisions and are not distracted by parents’ fear or safety concerns.

Sussex has some great Forest Schools and a setting such as Lymley Wood can also help with families who need to access funding for children who have an EHCP, as their Forest School is an alternative education provision.

If your children are home educated or on part-time timetables then looking at Forest Schools is a fabulous forest schoolingoption to engage them in their own education.

Mel Parr runs Lymley Wood CIC based near Five Ashes, in East Sussex. For further details please feel free to call 07951 257813 or visit www.lymleywood.co.uk

Nov 07
Love0
holistic education

A holistic approach to education

By Education, Girls school, Relationships, Wellbeing
by Rebecca Mudde
Prep School Head of Academic Mentoring and Thinking Skills at St Catherine’s Prep School, Bramley

In the world of education, the wellbeing of students is like the compass guiding their journey – a fundamental aspect that shapes not just academic success but the overall experience of learning and growing. Schools are not just places of learning; they are the foundation for building well-rounded individuals ready to face the challenges of life. Academic success should not come at the expense of a student’s overall wellbeing.

Schools are where children learn to socialise, make friends and deal with all the ups and downs of life. By focusing on their wellbeing, we are helping them build social skills, empathy and resilience. The result? Children who are not just academically able but also emotionally intelligent and ready to face the complexities of the real world.

By prioritising wellbeing, we are not just helping the students feel good about themselves; we are boosting their brainpower. A healthy mind does not memorise facts; it thinks creatively, critically and stays engaged in the learning process. In providing a positive school environment, we are not only improving outcomes but also instilling a genuine love for learning, making education a lifelong adventure.

Academic success is intrinsically linked to mental and emotional health, and as such it is important to implement innovative programmes to support the balance. Having a dedicated wellbeing space where students can visit and take time out of their day to relax and reflect is a beneficial resource.

A key too, in any school, is the pastoral team who play a pivotal role in shaping a school’s culture. Pastoral teams are not just mentors; they are champions of mental health, promoting positive wellbeing practices among not only the students but staff as well. Through workshops and awareness campaigns, the pastoral team can contribute to the creation of a supportive community where both students and staff feel valued.

By implementing programmes that address mental health openly, we are not just tackling stigma; we are providing a safety net for students to talk about their worries. We provide them with the support they need to help prevent bigger issues developing down the road by equipping them with the tools to cope with life’s challenges.

By placing happiness and mental health on the priority list, we are not just nurturing minds; we are setting the stage for futures filled with promise and balance. Happy minds lead to bright futures.

St Catherine’s Prep School extends a warm welcome to parents who would like to visit the school. Visit www.stcatherines.info to find out more about upcoming open mornings and arranging a visit.

Nov 06
Love0

Top tips for families when choosing an inclusive bookshelf

By Education, reading

Inclusive Books for Children co-founder, Sarah Satha, shares her thoughts on how to make your child’s bookshelf more inclusive and how to find stories that will captivate your little readers and help families find the fun in reading together.

We all want a just society. We want our children to grow into good people. And we want our children to know their worth. One way in which we can nurture this, whilst also encouraging a love of reading, is by giving our children access to brilliant stories about all different types of people.

On the one hand, this allows young readers to develop empathy for those who may seem different from themselves. On the other, when they see themselves reflected in a character, they will understand that they too are worthy of a story and an adventure. All this can be achieved while developing the habit of reading for pleasure, which research shows is closely tied with educational attainment and personal development.

It can be hard to know where to start when building an inclusive bookshelf. Our childhood favourites and the most eye-catching displays can let us down when it comes to diversity. Or we might worry about giving children a book about a heavy topic we dozeki bookn’t feel they’re ready for yet, such as racism.

Our charity Inclusive Books for Children exists to make it easy for parents to find the very best inclusive children’s books through our user-friendly website. Here is our guide to choosing the inclusive gems that will make for an enjoyable, engrossing read, as a family or for early independent reading.

The first thing we might look for when choosing an inclusive bookshelf, is a broad range of types of diversity. Some books manage this in themselves, such as The Nose, Toes and Tummy Book by Sally Nichols and Gosia Herba (Andersen Press) for little ones; People Need People by Benjamin Zephaniah and Nila Aye (Orchard Books) for the three to seven year olds; and The Dog Squad by Clara Vulliamy (HarperCollins), for those aged over seven. These books show a glorious range of ethnicities, disabilities and family structures.

If we’re looking to create a book collection that truly reflects the rich ethnic diversity of our society, we might look to find authentic representation of as many different ethnicities as we can. Great choices for the littlest readers are the Lenny series, by Ken Wilson Max, the Zeki series by Anna McQuinn and Rosalind Beardshaw (both Alanna Max), and Bhorta Bhorta Baby by Jumana Rahman and Maryam Huq (Bok Bok Books). In picture books for three to seven year olds, we recommend Strong Like Me, by Kelechi Okafor and Michaela Dias-Hayes (Puffin), Esma Farouk, Lost in the Souk by Lisa Boersen, Hasna Elbaamrani and Annelies Vandenbosch (Floris Books), My Bollywood Dream by Avani Dwidevi (Walker Books), and Aisha’s Colours by Nabila Adani (Walker Books). Emerging independent readers will love the Sam Wu series by Katie and Kevin Tsang (Farshore), aged seven and above, the Sona Sharma series by Chitra Soundar (Walker), aged six and above, and the brand new Destiny Ink series by Adeola Sokunbi (Nosy Crow), aged five and above.

There are also some fantastic books out there to show children that they don’t have to conform to harmful gender stereotypes, that can weigh as heavily on boys as they do on girls. Faruq and the Wiri Wiri by Sophie Payne and Sandhya Prabhat (Templar) gives us an aspiring chef, while Ballet Kids by Holly Sterling (Walker) tells the story of a young boy preparing for his first ballet performance, and in Look Up! by Nathan Bryon and Dapo Adeloa (Puffin) we meet Rocket, the mega space enthusiast. Meanwhile, for the six to nine year olds, Marv is a superhero with a heart in Alex Falase-Koya’s wonderful series of the same name (OUP), and Too Small Tola gives small-but-mighty in Atinuke’s excellent series (Walker).

At a time when neurodivergence diagnoses are rapidly increasing in the UK, picture books with neurodivergent characters can bring comfort and understanding. Gina Kaminski Rescues the Giant by Craig Barr-Green and Francis Martin (Little Tiger), Bear Shaped by Dawn Coulter-Cruttenden (OUP) and Thunderboots by Naomi Jones and Rebecca Asdown (OUP) are all great examples.

Finally, great disability representation in a book can go a long way to dispelling stereotypes that can cause as much difficulty in the life of a disabled person as their disability itself. In picture books, we suggest What Happened to You? by James Catchpole and Karen George (Faber & Faber), and Terrible Horses by Raymond Antrobus and Ken Wilson-Max (Walker). In chapter books, try Ellie and the Marriage List by Tricia Seabolt (Lantana) and My Other Life by Polly Ho-Yen (Knights Of).

There are loads of great resources out there, so you never have to go it alone. Awards longlists and shortlists are a great source of inspiration. Our own IBC Awards shine a light on books for children up to the age of nine, but for older age children and young adults, the Diverse Book Awards and the Jhalak Prize are a treasure trove of ideas. A number of independent bookshops, both brick and mortar and online, focus on diversity, such as Afrori Books, Mirror Me Write, and A New Chapter Books. Happy Reading!

Inclusive Books for Children is a charity with a free website for families, schools and libraries that helps them easily choose books for a more inclusive bookshelf. IBC showcases stories that represent all types of family and don’t draw on gender stereotypes or negative tropes. They feature books with a variety of ethnicities, positive images of disabilities and different identities, and celebrate Own-Voice authors and illustrators.

www.inclusivebooksforchildren.org

Nov 06
Love0
baby biting

Help! My child bites…

By Early Years, Health, teeth and dental care

by Jovita Opio
Nursery Manager, Little Lancing Day Nursery & Forest School

Biting is a more common behaviour than one might think amongst very young children and it’s a topic that is not always spoken about very much, until it happens within your family. It can happen anywhere – in the home, at a soft play or play park, a child’s birthday party and of course in a childcare setting.

Biting can be a shock and it is certainly distressing – for the child or adult who has been bitten and the parents of a child who has been bitten who can understandably feel angry about it. It should go without saying that it is also upsetting for the parents of the child who has been biting.

Understanding about biting is vitally important to the way in which we respond to this happening – it is not the case that a child who bites is a ‘little monster’. He or she should not be punished for it, or worse still, bitten back. That’s not to say that this behaviour should simply be ignored. The following will help to explain why some children bite and what strategies can be employed to navigate a way through this behaviour.

Starting with the youngest of babies, as they begin to understand and engage with the world around them, they use all their senses as part of that natural exploration, and that includes using their mouths. Parents, carers and nursery staff all know that babies are inclined to put anything and everything into their mouths. It’s also a common feature of teething that babies will bite down on practically anything within reach to relieve the discomfort caused to their gums. It’s highly unlikely that children that young would deliberately bite another person with any kind of malice or ill feeling. In fact it’s sometimes the case that this is how they express their feelings of love – some babies only ever bite their parents!

As babies become toddlers, they continue to develop their language and communications skills and this happens at different times for different children. Some 18 month olds are real chatterboxes and others take more time to get to that stage. For those children whose language development occurs later, they may feel some frustration at not being able to express themselves and this can be a similar experience for children for whom English is an additional language.

Whenever children play together, there is inevitably a certain amount of disagreement that can creep in. For example, when both want to play with the same toy or when a child is blocking another child’s way, say on a slide or in a soft play environment. It’s a common reaction in such circumstances that a child may bite another child, or an adult, as they have not yet reached the point where they are able to express themselves verbally with the confidence to show their emotions.

Young children can find transitions and changes in their lives frustrating or stressful. For example, moving house, adjusting to changes in routine, the arrival of a new sibling as well as what might seem more mundane aspects of daily life, such as struggling to understand that they have to wait their turn to do something, or play with a particular toy, when they find it difficult to understand the concept of time. Biting can often be a response to relieving these frustrations and tensions.

It is also a possibility that some toddlers may find that biting focuses attention on them from adults and they see this as a reward. They are too young to differentiate between gaining attention through positive rather than negative behaviour. It’s also important to understand that children begin to realise that their behaviour (whatever it may be) can be a way for them to influence or control the environment or situation they find themselves in. Initially, biting can be a response to frustration or physical pain, but left unchecked, it may develop into a learned behaviour as a way of ending a situation they are not happy in or avoiding having to do something they do not want to do. It’s also the case that children at this stage of development may imitate all sorts of behaviours they see in others, and that includes biting.

Acquiring language and communication skills in turn leads into the stage in the early years development journey, where children begin to understand their emotions better and are more able to express themselves. This enables them to begin to self-regulate their responses to situations where they feel upset or angry.

So how best to deal with a situation when a child has bitten someone else?
For parents of the child who has been bitten, it’s understandable to feel anger and distress at what has happened. It’s all too easy to assume that the child who has been biting has additional needs (in most cases they don’t) and complaining to friends or other parents may not be helpful (and potentially embarrassing if your child then bites another person at another time). Discussing it with the parents of the child who has bitten may sometimes help understanding and clear the air but sadly this is not always a positive solution. If we are asking our children to be kind in their dealings with others, we should be kind too.

Parents of young children who bite often do not know where to turn or how to help their child through this stage. It can feel overwhelming but there is help at hand. They can turn to their Health Visitor for advice, and if attending an Early Years setting, the nursery staff will be supportive. Working with parents to devise strategies is key, as is consistency in approach to biting.

Whether at home with family or within an early years setting, there are a number of strategies that can help children through this stage in their development. These include:
• Praising and rewarding positive behaviour, so children don’t only get attention for negative behaviour.
• When a child bites another child, focus the attention first on comforting the child who has been bitten, so the child who has bitten does not receive priority attention. Remove them from the situation and make it clear with simple phrases such as “Stop. Biting hurts your friend. Biting isn’t kind.” The days of the ‘naughty step’ should be long past – in fact the word ‘naughty’ should not even come into the conversation.
• Providing sensory activities to create a similar experience to the biting behaviour and build these into a child’s daily routine – whether a ‘chew’ teething toy, such as a ‘chew buddy’, a ‘chew necklace’ or offering a healthy crunchy snack of fruit or vegetables.
• Redirecting a child’s attention to offer an alternative activity if they are struggling to regulate their response to a frustrating situation is a useful technique to defusing tension.
• Using visual prompts and storytelling to the children (at nursery this usually takes place as a group activity) helps them to learn. For example, if there has been an incident at a soft play, this can become the theme of a social story, using role play, such as puppets, to help children understand better positive strategies to use in social situations.
teeth are not for biting• Reading storybooks, for example the behaviour series by Elizabeth Verdick and other authors, such as ‘Teeth are not for Biting’, is commonly used in Early Years settings to help reinforce positive messages about behaviour. These could also be used by parents at home. This is most beneficial if used proactively, rather than as a reaction to specific events.
• Modelling turn-taking activities and extending play to other popular toys and interests so the child is engaged in another activity while waiting for the toy they want. Having more than one of a particularly popular toy or activity available can help smooth out any potentially tricky situations. Using a sand timer as a visual aid to help children to understand when it’s their turn can also help teach them to learn to wait.

For repeated incidences of biting, nursery staff monitor the ‘Why, Where, When’ of occurrences, to see if there is a pattern for this. For instance, is it when they are tired or hungry, or is there an activity that regularly triggers the impulse to bite? It may in fact be a combination of factors and strategies can then be put in place to help avoid situations that can give rise to biting.

For the parents of a child who bites, it is important to know that they are not alone. Very many children, some say up to a quarter of all children, will bite at some point during their early lives. Most commonly this is amongst those aged two to three years. That doesn’t make it any less difficult for all concerned but it is helpful to know that it is a phase that usually will pass.

The Lancing College family includes its two Prep Schools located in Hove and Worthing and Little Lancing Day Nursery & Forest School which offers day care all-year round for children aged two months and over. www.littlelancing.co.uk, www.lancingcollege.co.uk

Nov 06
Love0
doula and baby

Doulas – what are they and what benefits do they bring?

By baby health, Childcare and Nannying, Early Years, family
by Jo Slade
Birth and postnatal doula

Imagine being able to look forward to your birth without fear. Or enter motherhood and family life feeling calm and supported. This is exactly what a doula can help you with! In a time where it is so important to seek your own education around pregnancy, childbirth and postnatal care, a doula can be beside you every step of the way.

A birth doula
A birth doula is a non-medical professional, trained to provide support to women and families throughout pregnancy and birth. They will get to know you during your pregnancy, and can provide evidence-based information and antenatal education about what to expect from labour and birth, as well as being on-call to join you when you give birth – whether at home, in hospital or at a birth centre – to provide non-judgemental, practical, and emotional support.

They can be instead of, or in addition to, a birth partner. Someone who is there for you (both), who knows you and what’s important to you, and can give you the confidence to look forward to, plan, and advocate for the birth you want – whether you are aiming for a completely natural experience, a planned caesarean, or something in between!

Studies show that the continuity of care and support that doulas provide can lead to:
• Decreased likelihood of a caesarean or instrumental delivery.
• Increased likelihood of a shorter labour.
• Decrease in use of pain medication.
• Increased likelihood of feeling positive about your experience.
• Decreased likelihood of feeding issues.

A doula can be a great choice for first time mothers and parents – helping to settle nerves and talk about the unknown, but also for subsequent parents, who maybe didn’t have the best experience of birth or the postnatal period the first time around and want to feel more informed and supported going forward.

The average price of a birth doula ranges from £500 to £2000. This depends on your area, the different services offered and the level of experience of the doula.

A postnatal doula
A postnatal doula is professionally trained to provide support to women and families following the birth of their baby. The postnatal period should be a time to slow things down, take time to recover and enjoy your new baby, and although wonderful, it can sometimes feel overwhelming, as it’s all so new!

A doula will visit you at home, support you with adjustment to life with a new baby and give you the confidence to find your own way of mothering and parenting. They can help with:
• Breastfeeding and feeding.
• Holding your newborn so you can rest or have a bath.
• Hearing and chatting about your birth story.
• Light housework.
• Preparing nourishing meals.
• Entertaining older siblings.
• Walking the dog!

The importance of feeling supported and cared for in what is sometimes known as the fourth trimester should never be underestimated – it can have a substantial impact on your health and happiness going forward.

A postnatal doula usually charges by the hour, with a minimum number of hours booked. Hourly rates can range between £15 and £30.

There are birth and postnatal doulas, and many that provide both services. Most doulas offer an initial meeting, either in person or via Zoom, to see whether you are suited to each other, and they will expect you to be meeting with other doulas before you make your decision.

Some reputable online directories you can visit to find a trained doula in your area are:
• The Doula Directory
• Doula UK
• Find My Doula

Investing – time, energy and money – into one of the most important days of your life, and the months following, is a powerful acknowledgement that you are worthy of support.

However, if cost is a prohibitive factor, there may be some funds available. For example, the Doula UK access fund and Doulas Without Borders.

Jo Slade is a birth and postnatal doula. She lives in Brighton and provides doula support to families in many locations across East and West Sussex. For enquiries or to find out more, you can visit her website www.thedoulajoslade.co.uk email: jo@thedoulajoslade.co.uk or call her on 07779 457640

 

Nov 05
Love0
maths anxiety

Maths anxiety

By numeracy skills, special educational needs
by Anna Dalglish
Kumon Guildford North Study Centre

Many children develop a fear of maths which can affect their performance in carrying out mathematical tasks, particularly in test conditions, and which can go on to affect their adult lives and careers.

Solving mathematical problems requires students to use working memory, but stress and anxiety occupy the working memory with anxious thoughts, preventing the student from concentrating upon the problem at hand. A vicious cycle leads the student to avoid maths tasks, consequently falling further behind in their understanding, which in turn increases their anxiety.

What can we do to help our children avoid or overcome maths anxiety?
Here are ten tips:

1. Help your child develop a positive attitude to maths from a young age. This will build motivation, confidence and a ‘can-do’ attitude. Children learn from their parents, and so we should aim to model a positive attitude about maths. Try not to say, “I’m terrible at maths” (even if it is true). Focus instead on positive achievements from your own experience – “I used to find the 9 times table difficult but then I worked out a way to remember it”.

2. Make maths fun by playing games involving numbers – card games, Monopoly, any game which uses dice, playing shops and counting out the correct money, magnetic number boards, joining the dots, counting together up to and over 100, baking together (measuring out the ingredients), counting the ducks in the pond, and so on. Even with older children you can make a game out of maths. A long car journey with the family is a chance for healthy competition between siblings and parents! How quickly can you answer 3 x 8, 7 x 6? Who can recite the 7 times table backwards (from 10 x 7 down to 1 x 7)? What is the square root of 64?

3. Negative criticism and unrealistic expectations increase anxiety. Concentrate on the process rather than the result, praising your children for the effort they put into their work rather than the scores they achieve. Always seek something positive to praise, even if a child scores poorly in a maths task – “Well done for concentrating really hard on your work today” or “You did really well to keep going despite finding it difficult.” After praising achievements, suggest one more ‘can-do’ for your child to work on next.

4. Encourage a ‘growth mindset’ in your child – the belief that talent and ability are not innate or static but can be developed through effort, learning and persistence. This enables children to face challenges with confidence that they can be overcome. Intrinsic elements of the growth mindset include perseverance, and viewing mistakes as learning opportunities rather than failures.

5. Avoid stereotyping. Research shows that girls suffer maths anxiety more than boys. A possible reason being unhelpful cultural stereotypes regarding maths ability such as the belief that ‘boys are good at maths’ or that ‘maths is for Geeks’. Encourage your children from a young age not to make stereo-typical assumptions about the innate ability of boys and girls.

6. Encourage your child to take ownership of their learning and to develop an independent approach to learning. Anxiety can be increased by a feeling of lack of control over circumstances. Giving your child control over their learning (with appropriate support and guidance) can boost their confidence in their own ability to tackle difficulties. Even as young as three or four years old, something as simple as allowing your child to turn their own pages in a book is the beginning of independence.

7. Enable your child to become their own teacher, not dependent on others – instead of giving them answers, guide them towards answers and show them how, using the knowledge they already have, they can use various techniques to answer questions.

8. Mastery – maths anxiety can arise because a student has moved on too quickly before fully mastering a topic, such as number bonds or multiplication, both of which are essential foundations for more advanced topics. Sufficient practise is essential and children should not try to run before they can walk. If necessary, go back to basics and help your child fill in any gaps in their understanding.

9. Everyday familiarity with numbers and maths helps to reduce anxiety. A regular daily study habit of just five or 10 minutes a day is a good habit to develop at any age and will enable children to practise and embed basic concepts such as number bonds and times tables, thus freeing up their working memory for more challenging tasks as they progress to more advanced maths topics.

10. Find a method of learning or tuition that is tailored to your child. Every child is different and needs an approach that works for their particular needs and abilities.

Anna Dalglish is the Maths and English Instructor at the Kumon Guildford North Study Centre, one of over 600 Kumon Study Centres nationwide. For further information please visit www.kumon.co.uk

 

Nov 02
Love0
happy child

Teaching our children resilience

By Education, family, Mental health, Wellbeing
by Mrs Sarah Bakhtiari
Principal of Shoreham College

I have been a head teacher for six years, in two schools. A mother for 24 years, married for 30 and an educator for 29. When I was pregnant with my eldest daughter, I decided to do a Masters because I thought I would be bored with a newborn. The reason I reel off this list is that I couldn’t do these things without resilience (and optimism and foolishness – but they are different articles, and so I shall stick to resilience today!).

There is a buzz around resilience. I’ve been on training courses for it; read books and articles about it; been told I need more of it. The trouble is, I’m quite suspicious of the idea of resilience. The more I think about it, the more I’m reminded of a game I used to play on rainy days as a small child.

On said rainy day we would get the board games out of the cupboard and my family would all play. While it’s hard to choose a favourite, if I had to, it would be Buckaroo. The plastic donkey pressed into position before my brother and I took turns to pile all the random miscellany on its back, seeing how much the donkey could take before everything got bucked off. The moment it sprang and threw the plastic novelties all over the floor always made us jump and giggle, before we started the whole process all over again. That poor donkey never seemed to get much peace, being tested to its limit over and over. But that’s how I feel when people talk about how we should all be more resilient, as if we’re all plastic donkeys being piled upon until we snap.

Our children will encounter a myriad of challenges in their lives – everyone I’ve encountered has faced difficult times at some point. While some may have to overcome larger obstacles than others, every single person experiences struggles. Life is undeniably beautiful, yet equally tough.

How do we prepare our children to face the complexities and thrive?
When we talk about resilience, I think that what we mean is being able to face the complexities, the curved balls and the challenges of life and emerge on the other side, and I understand that, but I also think there’s more to it.

Let me illustrate. I love to swim. I’ve got into the super-trendy pastime of outdoor swimming, mostly in the sea. However, earlier this year, I visited a friend who insisted I got into the choppy North Sea. The waves didn’t look that big and I’m used to the cold, so I waded in. The first and second waves were fine and I began to relax – perhaps too much – and only when the third wave was a foot away from my face did I realise I’d misjudged it. I hadn’t widened my stance or braced myself for impact and over I went, and got a mouthful of the North Sea and a face full of shingle. I learned in that moment that resilience is also about bracing for the wave. Realising the thing that’s approaching is going to leave you a little battered, doing all you can to get ready for it and, when it’s over, all you can to recover. Life will break you at points, you can’t help that, but what you can do is be as ready as you can be for its knocks and bruises and work on healing them as quickly as possible. That’s what I hope we mean by resilience, but the trouble is, resilience seems to have become a code word for something else.

We’ve all felt it – that moment when the list starts to mount. We all like to please people, all like to help where we can. Perhaps you’ve agreed to bake for the winter fair and that on its own is fine, but then you also have to finish the last bit of work, remember to pay a bill and call your friend to wish them a happy birthday. You get jostled in the supermarket and suddenly it all becomes too much. The Buckaroo donkey can’t hold it any more and bucks. Perhaps you need to be more resilient, or perhaps it might be time to acknowledge your limits.

Resilience has transformed into a notion that implies we must endure hardships silently and soldier on. The truth is, I am vulnerable. But my vulnerability does not make me weaker (or stronger) than anyone else. True strength isn’t about bravely facing life’s pressures and forcefully overcoming obstacles as if they don’t exist. It’s about acknowledging our weaknesses and vulnerabilities. Strength is honed through moments of vulnerability. While resilience portrays a triumphant figure plowing through obstacles, strength often manifests as a tearful heap – overwhelmed, exposed, yet unapologetically authentic. Resilience appears to be an individual pursuit, while strength thrives on collective support, where we can lean on one another and draw strength from those around us.

Allow me to share an analogy. My dog died last year. A much-loved family pet suddenly wasn’t there any more, and I was devastated. A time for resilience, perhaps? But I did something else. I cried and cried and cried. I cried in the departure lounge at the airport, I cried arriving at the hotel, I cried over breakfast in the morning, and at night-time. The other holiday makers were really confused. My husband and daughters didn’t try and stop me, they just acknowledged I was hurting.

I didn’t need to be more resilient; I needed to stay broken for a bit and lean on the strength of others. I found a strength that didn’t come from brushing myself off and getting on with it, but rather from feeling the pain and sitting with it for a while. And I still miss my dog, but now it’s peaceful instead of raw.

Resilience sometimes feels like we are supposed to cover up the scars, but strength allows them to be seen as if they are badges of honour, scars that made us who we are.

So, when I’m in resilience training and people are talking about how to cope with what’s going on, I can’t help but picture that Buckaroo donkey and, well, I’m not having that. Life is tough, but the stuff you do have to carry is less of a burden if you let people who care about you hold it for you, even just for a little while.

If life is the mountain, resilience is about powering up it without taking a break and pretending you aren’t out of breath and you don’t have blisters. Whereas true strength is about acknowledging you can’t take another step and asking if anyone fancies a sit down. The beauty is that when you take that precious moment to pause, you can also take a look at the path you’ve just walked up and who you’ve walked it with and be surprised by the ground you’ve covered. By admitting small defeats and looking down the mountain, you are less likely to lose sight of the bigger picture and what it took to get you there, feeling your feet on the ground and anchoring yourself.

You don’t have to be anyone’s Buckaroo donkey: you’ll only get overloaded, flip and make a mess. There’s nothing wrong in saying it’s all a bit too much.

So, what does this mean for our children and schools? Research tells us that the children who perform the best are those who can ask for help, act on it and have the strength to persevere – and not in buckaroo style, but in a collective endeavour with you, with their school and with their peers. Our children learn from us – let’s show them strength in all its forms. When your children need support, let their school know and let them work with you to put that supportive net around them and when you need support, I hope you have the people around you who will work through it with you, in whatever form you need.

Please call 01273 592681 to find out more about what Shoreham College can offer you, or to arrange a personal visit at any time of the school year. www.shorehamcollege.co.uk

 

Aug 15
Love0
piglets at a farm

Beyond the barn doors – a day in the life of a livestock worker

By Education, environment, Exercise, Family Farms, Food & Eating, Forest School, fun for children, Green, Mental health, Uncategorized
by Nicola Henderson
Godstone Farm

Amongst the hustle and bustle of a busy attraction, there’s often work behind the scenes that visitors don’t see or appreciate. Welcome to a world where hard work can indeed be fun, where the welfare of animals reigns supreme and the bond between human and animal is fascinating.

Contrary to popular belief, the life of a livestock worker is not merely about mucking out, getting muddy and driving around in a tractor. It is about forging connections – building trust with our four-legged friends and fostering an environment where they thrive. Every stroke of the brush, every scoop of feed, is an opportunity to nurture this bond, reminding us of the huge part we play in the lives of these creatures.

Let’s go down on the farm and take a look at a typical day:

7.30am: As the sun climbs overhead, and the animals are waking up, the first shift of workers arrive at the farm – this assumes it’s a ‘quiet’ time of the year, and there’s no lambing or other babies due to be born. First job of the day is to open all enclosures, cages, hutches and sheds. The animals are locked away safely at night due to the continual threat of hungry foxes.

8.30am: The hungry animals receive breakfast, fresh water and a visual check. The visual check ensures the animals are acting as they should, have no cuts or abrasions and are moving around well. This time is a chance for the animals to familiarise themselves with their care givers once again and build on previously built trust. Many of the smaller animals will be handled regularly to ensure they are comfortable should any first aid or medicine need to be administered in the future. Larger animals are handled too but often with four feet still on the ground, and with two or more workers to ensure everyone’s safety.

10am: The cleaning starts! Some animals will get a spot clean, others will be due for a full muck out – it’s not hard to guess that the smelliest of all are the pigs! Mucking out isn’t just to ensure the enclosure is clean to look at and smells fresh, it also ensures the welfare of the animals. A dirty environment can contribute towards skin conditions, foot issues and spread of infectious diseases. After removing all soiled straw, pens are disinfected, and then new bedding is laid. You’ll often see the animals return to a clean bed and have a good sniff or roll around, it’s their sign of appreciation! This time spent mucking out is another opportunity to strengthen the bond between human and animal, inquisitive characters will often want to ‘help’ and it’s not unusual to see a pig steal a broom or a pony with its head in the wheelbarrow.

As the team make their way around the farm cleaning and caring for livestock, they also need to ensure the customer facing areas of the farm are ready. Customer facing areas include those where up-close interactions happen, where a trail can be followed and where bespoke experiences take place.

11.30am: The hay run! With bags piled high with hay the tractor embarks on a journey to those harder to reach areas, the further afield fields, where sheep, cows, goats and horses graze. It’s a fun part of the job, using a vehicle to get around but it can be a challenge in wet weather when the fields get muddy.

1pm: After the wheelbarrows are emptied, the paths are swept, and the buckets are washed its finally time for lunch! This is the human’s lunch time, most animals don’t get lunch, only breakfast and dinner, unless they are on medication or have a very special diet. With such physical exertion the livestock team will enjoy a hearty lunch, often microwaving leftovers and filling up on treats bought by the management team. They are particularly partial to a donut or cupcake, and it can’t be denied that they burn off the calories!

1.30pm: It’s time to get ready for any behind the scenes experiences that day – this might be the chance for budding young farmers to work with the team, or for grown-ups to feed the meerkats. For example, if the meerkats are being fed by special visitors, then a gourmet snack will be prepared, this will be tasty grubs and worms. The visitors will get to sit inside the enclosure and feed the meerkats via tongs (just in case of any fingers that look remarkably like worms). Whilst a farm will prioritise its animals living as nature intended, in genuine habitats and won’t want all its animals to be tame, some experiences do help ensure that the animals aren’t fearful of human contact. This is especially helpful if they are taken unwell. Have you ever tried to catch a wild meerkat?!

4pm: After time spent imparting knowledge and engaging with customers, it’s back to the heavy and dirty work. Most of the animals require an evening feed. This is an opportunity for a further visual check (in depth health checks are done routinely as well) and water will be replenished. Unless it’s a particularly hot evening each animal will be put to bed after their dinner, but only once their bed has been checked for extra comfiness. Animals are kept for many reasons, but generally a lot of the animals in a farm attraction will be pets and everyone will have their favourites of course!

5-6pm: Depending on the time of year the livestock workers finish their day and head home for a well-deserved bath and rest. It all starts again tomorrow. Animals need caring for 24/7, 365 days a year so taking on a farm, smallholding or even a family pet is a decision to be well considered.

Godstone Farm enjoys welcoming customers to visit their many animals with engagement and education at its heart. The farm often recruits for roles working with the livestock team but can also offer advice for anyone lookingto keep an animal as a pet. www.godstonefarm.co.uk

Aug 12
Love0
ADHD Child

How to support your child if you think they have ADHD – what parents can do to help

By Education, Mental health, special educational needs, Special support needs, Wellbeing
by Leanne Maskell
author of ADHD an A-Z and ADHD Works at Work

With years long waiting lists for NHS assessments, and an overload of information online, it’s normal to feel overwhelmed if you think your child has ADHD.

From confusion around the pros and cons of ‘labelling your child’, to untangling advocacy and ensuring they can access the support they need, it can be very stressful for parents, let alone the children they’re trying to help.

However, a formal diagnosis isn’t necessary – if you think your child has ADHD, this a great first step in being able to ‘name it to tame it’.

Here’s what else may be helpful:
1. Learn about ADHD
Research into ADHD has improved significantly over the last few years, showing how it’s not just for ‘naughty little boys’. It can be extremely helpful for parents to learn about the 30% developmental delay in executive functioning skills, such as self-awareness, impulsivity, and emotional regulation, enabling them to better understand their children through an ADHD lens.

Education provides empowerment and context. Instead of thinking a child isn’t trying, understanding ADHD can help you to see how they’re doing their best – and how to help them.

Learning about ADHD from credible sources such as books like ADHD: an A to Z can provide an overview of how this may impact your child, such as sleep, mental health, and organisation.

2. Talk to your child
Your child is the expert in themselves! Consider the reasons why you think they may have ADHD, and have an open conversation with them about this, depending on their age.

It can help to discuss challenges and strengths in a curious, collaborative, and compassionate way. Explaining that you’ve noticed some challenges and concepts like neurodiversity in accessible language can be very helpful for children’s self-esteem and sense of personal responsibility.

ADHD isn’t an excuse, but it can explain things. It’s important to involve your child in decisions affecting them, such as around diagnosis or medication.

3. Understand your options
Only a qualified medical professional can formally diagnose ADHD, and waiting lists can be very long, but it’s always worth speaking to your GP about any challenges to understand your options.

You have a legal ‘Right To Choose’ the NHS assessor your child is referred to, and providers such as Psychiatry UK operate online, and offer significantly reduced waiting times.

It’s especially important to understand shared care agreements if you’re considering a private assessment (which can be very expensive).

It’s also important to talk to your child’s school. An Education, Health, and Care Plan (EHCP) can formalise the funding and provision of tailored help such as special educational support. Your child does not need a formal diagnosis to apply.

Even without an EHCP, schools can still offer support. As ADHD can be a disability, organisations may have a legal duty to make reasonable adjustments under the Equality Act 2010, regardless of a formal diagnosis.

Finally, your child may also qualify for Disability Living Allowance, even without a diagnosis. This is financial support based on the support your child needs in terms of care and mobility.

4. Tailor your child’s environment
Children with ADHD will thrive with predictable structure and routine. Establishing clear expectations and providing positive reinforcement can be very helpful – children with ADHD have been found to receive 20,000 more negative comments than their peers by age 12!

Breaking tasks into manageable steps, limiting distractions and encouraging physical activity can support concentration. Adopting a coaching approach can help your child to take responsibility for the strategies that help them to thrive.

It’s important to provide reassurance and psychological safety, as children with ADHD may be more likely to experience mental health challenges. Having ongoing conversations about their wellbeing can help to resolve challenges early, building their confidence in knowing that they are supported.

5. Seek support
Being a parent can be very difficult, let alone one trying to understand ADHD and provide the best support possible!

Remember that you’re already doing a brilliant job, and ensure you look after your own wellbeing, such as with therapy. You can’t give from an empty cup!

Parents with ADHD may find it very helpful to connect with one another, such as within a support group. Seeking out ADHD coaching for yourself can also really help with establishing strategies to help you and your child thrive with ADHD.

Although it’s tempting to want to provide all of this support to your child above yourself, if they’re not enthusiastic, it’s unlikely to be as effective as it would be with you!

You are simply doing your best with what you have available to you, and a supportive, loving parent will always be the best medicine. ADHD is lifelong – you hADHD logoave time to figure it out together!

Leanne Maskell is an ADHD Coach, Director of ADHD Works and author of ADHD an A-Z and ADHD Works at Work

Aug 12
Love0
school early year's play

The importance of play in Early Years education

By Early Years, Education, fun for children, Mental health, play, Playing
by Ivana Colvin
Little Chicks Teacher, Chinthurst School Nursery

As parents and educators, we often find ourselves caught up in the whirlwind of schedules, milestones and academic expectations for our little ones. In the pursuit of ensuring a bright future for our children, we might unintentionally overlook one of the most powerful tools at our disposal – play.

In the UK, the Early Years education system places a strong emphasis on the importance of play-based learning. In the best Early Years settings, play should not be considered a break from structured activities, rather it should be at the centre of fostering development, curiosity and a lifelong love for learning. At home, play is vital too, supporting your child’s growth, health and happiness.

One of the greatest gifts of play is its ability to nurture social skills. In the classroom and on the school playground, children learn to navigate social interactions, share, co-operate and challenge with their peers. These skills form the bedrock of healthy relationships and contribute to a positive learning environment. At home, family playtime is an ideal way to reinforce these social skills in a more intimate setting. Board games, collaborative projects and shared activities provide opportunities for your child to practice communication and teamwork with siblings and parents.

The Early Years curriculum also recognises the importance of nurturing creativity, and play is the perfect gateway to unlocking the boundless imagination which exists within each child. Creative activities embedded in the curriculum allow children to explore various forms of expression, from art and music to storytelling and drama. At home, opportunities for creative play are endless. Simple activities like drawing, crafting and storytelling stimulate a child’s imagination and encourage them to think outside the box. By embracing creativity in play, we cultivate a mindset that values innovation and problem-solving, vital skills for future learning.

In an age dominated by screens, finding a balance between technology and real-world play is crucial. The Early Years curriculum acknowledges the role of technology but emphasises that it should complement, not replace, hands-on, interactive play. Both at school and at home, we should strive to create an environment where technology is used as a tool to enhance learning rather than as a substitute for real-world experiences. By setting limits on screen time and actively engaging in screen-free play, we can foster a healthy relationship with technology from an early age.

Play also offers a safe space for children to express and regulate their emotions. Whether engaging in pretend play or co-operative games, children learn to manage their feelings and develop resilience in navigating various social situations. This emotional regulation is a vital part of their healthy growth and development, laying the groundwork for a successful and happy life at school and beyond.

As we reflect on the importance of play, both at school and at home, it is important to recognise the symbiotic relationship that exists between these two environments. By focusing on play, parents and Early Years practitioners hold the key to unlocking a child’s full potential.

It is through play that children not only discover the world around them but also uncover the limitless possibilities within themselves. Play strengthens the bond between parents and children and helps to build close relationships between a child and their teacher. Through shared play experiences, parents and teachers can connect with their children, provide support and guidance, and create lasting memories together.

In the midst of laughter and games, the foundations for a future defined by curiosity, resilience and a love for learning are built. So, the next time you find your living room transformed into a magical kingdom or a construction site, embrace the chaos and join in the play! In those moments of shared joy, you’re not just playing – you are actively participating in the profound process of shaping a brighter, more vibrant future for your child.

Chinthurst is an independent school and nursery based in Tadworth, close to Epsom, Banstead, Kingswood and Reigate. It is a junior school of Reigate Grammar School. www.chinthurstschool.co.uk

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